7 Rules for Making THE HOBBIT Movie Comments - Mania.com


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karas1 11/19/2009 4:53:01 PM

It must be 30 years or more since I saw The Hobit by Rankin Bass.  I still remember the Goblins singing

"Down Down to Goblin Town.  You go, my lad!"

It was a great song.  Somehow, 'Down Down to Orc Town" just doesn't have the same ring.

And the Elves can sing anything they want.  It's their party and if they want to drink halucinogic wine and sing keroke that's their call.

You can't get rid of any of the Dwarves.  They don't all have to talk much, but they haveto be there.


almostunbiased 11/19/2009 6:10:22 PM

Devilcow, no comment on how they have already been seen petrified in the Lord of the Rings movies.  They were, so they have to be petrified in the hobbit.

Devilcow 11/19/2009 6:51:06 PM

Almostunbiased...   I don't think I can win on the trolls comment.   It's just always been a pet peeve of mine that they turned to stone in the hobbit, but functioned fine in the LOTR.    I know they were seen, so it probably can't be changed, but what can I say... it's just always bugged me. 

In regards to your earlier comment that they were under the dark cloud from Mordor during the fight for Minas Tirith...  all I can say is I don't think that those trolls would not have turned to stone.   For one thing, in the movie, they are operating the gate levers in the open sun.  For another, when the wind changes and Aragorn arrives, it seems clear that the sun starts shining again... yet no trolls turn to stone then.

In fact, Tolkien discussed this discrepancy in appendix F, when he noted that at the end of the third age a troll race appeared that had not been seen before, the Olog-hai.  Unlike the older race of "twillight" trolls, these trolls could endure the sun.  And, to me, these trolls are way cooler and scarier.

That being said...  I should probably back off the trolls point, since I'm quite clearly in the minority, and quite possibly in a minority of one.   Still,  I wish they had died another way.

DrWimsey 11/19/2009 8:32:01 PM

 This is tongue-in-cheek, but dead-on.  I'm sorry folks, but if you think that any of this alters the plot, then you do not understand what "plot" means.  

Double this essay for Deathly Hallows, too.  The big question is: which film will see a bigger drop-off for part 2, the Hobbit or Deathly Hallows?  I think that we might be looking at Matrix III types of drops in both cases. 

FerretJohn 11/19/2009 8:42:47 PM

Devil, I think I can help.  In the books Sauron created a massive field of twilight over all of Gondor, allowing the light-sensitive orcs and trolls to operate freely.  Of course for logistical reasons that little detail wasn't entirely feasable in the movies, it would've increased budget and production time conciderably and decreased the visibility of the action.  So just think of it as They were protected by the magics of Sauron, magics that at the end didn't dissipate until they were out of camera range (or in the massive sinkhole).

Don't sweat the petties and don't pet the sweaties.  Just sit back and enjoy the show.

lobbygow723 11/19/2009 9:55:52 PM

 Concerning critics........let us not throw out the "goblin" with the bath water.  Some very concerting points.  The last shall be first, as it is the one point that shall inherit the entirety of the Tolkien world if it is to be delivered as it is intended and wished upon by GDT as he has promised---the dragon!  Yes, this must be, as GDT has spoke, the dragon of all dragons.  This alone can, and I believe will, elevate this series above ALL dragon movies and, I dare say, LotR for its lore and heritage--and that is not a trifle accomplishment!!!   All LotR fans, deep down, hope for that so as to continue our spiritual journey with all the characters of this other-world, nether-world.... dream-world that we all grasp for but can never fully realize.  Guillermo will deliver the visual, and Peter will envelope it in the spiritual what we all see in our great mind's eye.   The dragon will deliver.

Trolls will turn to stone just as the sun rises in the East.  You know this to be true.  It is true because it has been told.

The dwarves, as many have stated, are to be as the book includes and describes.  There are many meanings in the numbers.  Bilbo's efforts are to keep the 13 together much as the Fellowship.  Bilbo's feats of bravery and self-confidence (Hobbits are NOT at all brave or adventurous by nature), by saving all the dwarfs, not just one or two, bestow in him the haughtiness to take possession of the ring and later, the sacrifice to walk away from the ring because he is more than just himself. 

Orcs and goblins are none to be reckoned with.  Goblins yes, they are unmotivated, but fierce and bloodthirsty just the same if given cause, long on food, or idle for too many nights.  Yes, goblins live in the mountains and fear the daylight.   They hunt at night under cover of darkness.  The Ulruk Hai were evolved over a hundred years later to travel at daylight by the magic of a wizard.  Goblins are a more crude, but a no less gruesome, murdering, albeit unorganized, lot than their future soldieristic bigger and badder brothers, the Ulruk Hai.  But, ask yourself if you would like to bump into a band of goblins half way under a mountain in the 2nd age of Middle Earth.  The answer is clearly no.

Ok, the elves by nature are a peaceful race.  They are virtually immortal and have seen many wars.  They are wise to rejoice in the joy of life and nature.  They have proved to be a resilient race and with great magic of their own, have little to fear.  The elves live long and know the value and reality of the after-life.  They also understand the natural flow of life and death, but will intervene if evil is seen to have an unfair advantage.  Their call to arms can be swift and their "hunting" skills can be trained on their common enemy in the beat of a hummingbird's wing.  They are as dumb as a fox and the perfect ally.  Their heart, sense of justice, and magic must never be under underestimated.      

Your first point critic will be your last.  Any true LotR fan savors any and every minute of Peter Jackson's visualization of Tolkien's written word.  Peter is a true extension of JRR Tolkien in the most literal, visual and spiritual sense.  He has put to the canvas what we all see in our minds.  This is a dangerous badge to afix to any one man--to paint what only the heart and mind can see.  Why did his movies and dvd's create over $3 billion???  No one can put a price on publishing your own personal memories, dreams, nightmares, and fantasies.  But, Peter did for so many, including this humble soul.  He is truly part elf, goblin, wizard, necromancer, horse lord, dragon, and hobbit.  Otherwise defined as an Aussie.  Good on ya' mate!!!  Peter, thank you, thank you, thank you.  To millions you are our Sam.    "Don't you leave him Samwise Gamgee.  And I mean not to."  You have carried this story all the way to our heart of hearts.  Well done. 

bprincess 11/19/2009 11:53:36 PM

Is this author trying to be sarcastic, or not-so-subtly dissing JRR Tolkien and his works?  Reason 7 is understandable, but everything goes downhill from there.  Taking out some of the THIRTEEN (not twelve) dwarves just because your brain is too small to remember all thirteen names is stupid, and nitpicking about the goblin vs. orc thing is unnecessary.  And the whole troll should not turn to stone in sunlight just shows how much YOU know about Lord of the Rings.  In the Fellowship of the Ring, Sam points out the stone trolls when Frodo was suffering from the Nazgul stab wound.  Ignoring that in The Hobbit would be a bit of a stupid idea on Jackson and del Toro's part, wouldn't it?  Oh, and make Smaug scary?  Thanks for pointing that out, Captain Obvious.

I clicked on the link to read this article thinking it would be witty and funny, but I guess it's my fault for thinking the author was someone other than a ten-year-old boy.


ManiaHasIssues 11/20/2009 12:39:40 AM

 most worthless mania article ever. does this site just take open submissions from anyone for their articles? is that how they get things this useless? sounds like a retarded studio exec wrote this piece.

(mania censored my comment, btw)

fallensbane 11/20/2009 8:41:54 AM

I am sick of lists in general. There are way to many on this site in general. But this list is the worst piece of shit offender off all the bad lists here. Burn it with fire, then douse it in acid.

Jimini 11/20/2009 1:19:25 PM

Reading this article I'm surprised by the amount of fear and lack of faith there is in del Toro's ability to make this movie appealing to the fans of the film and be faithful to the book, though with a mythology as beloved as this I shouldn't be I guess. But I too belong to the fanbase, this book is dearer to me than The Lord of the Rings itself, despite it's milder and simpler form. Infact it's probably my favourite book I'm not ashamed to say, and I'm 23! But I still have faith in the director's ability, especially as he is making the movie with pretty much the exact same great team of film makers who brought LOTR to life. But with respect to the man, just look at his previous work for assurance that he will do a great job, Pan's Labyrinth is a perfect example of the dark fairytale world that we want to visualise Middle Earth.

In regards to DevilCow's words in the article, your primary fear that this will be a film aimed at an audience comparative to the book, that being children, I think your fear is unnecessary. Not that my humble word is anything to go by, but trust me, I don't think del Toro will screw this up, he has Jackson by his side, and he has said on record that he wishes to respect the trilogy in his vision of The Hobbit, especially in the second film, saying the story by this point will seamlessly evolve into a darker story that blends perfectly into the feel of the trilogy. But to be honest, the first half of The Hobbit is quite light hearted, there isn't alot that goes on that would justify making the first installment a dark film!

That is actually my only real concern with him splitting the story in half, I don't know how he will make the first film gripping and exciting enough, in comparison to the second half. I saw an interview where del Toro hints the split will occur where Bilbo finds the One Ring. From that point on you have the goblins chasing the company, the company meeting the eagles, Beorn, going into Mirkwood, the attack of the spiders, the Mirkwood Elves, Lake Town, Smaug and then the Battle of Five Armies! Not to mention the side story of Gandalf and the Istari removing The Necromancer (Sauron) from Dol Guldur, which chronologically occurs when Bilbo and the Dwarves are deep in Mirkwood, I think. So to say this film should be in two parts is fair really, if it is to do any justice to the source material, I'm just concerned about the balance of the two movies.

The trolls turning to stone is really not an issue I think. I understand it bugging you when in Return of the King there are trolls storming Minas Tirith in the middle of the day, but as you are aware they are a seperate more advanced breed called Olog-Hai. Jackson probably should have made a small reference to the fact that they were adapted to bear sunlight in the third film, but this really shouldn't be a huge issue to those who are aware of the different troll types. I think seeing the trolls turn to stone in the movie could be quite a memorable scene, if done correctly.

Rest assured that the orcs will be mean, ugly fother muckers, with del Toro's creative mind, he's bound to come up with some shocking, bizarre but memorable looks for the orcs, or goblins...whatever. Likewise, with the lengthy period of pre production time the Weta guys have spent designing him, Smaug wil be the best f'ing dragon ever seen in a film! Enough said!

Lastly, I understand how thirteen dwarves, half of which say barely a word in the book, seems like alot in terms of a film cast, but I just think its going to upset alot of people if they are thrown out of the film, it wouldn't surprise me if they do though because Jackson did make some radical cuts in the trilogy to make the film easier to sit through for non-fans. Hopefully they won't though. Oh, and singing Elves? Who gives a crap? If its the seductive, enchanting way we hear them sing when Frodo and Sam see the Wood Elves in Fellowship I'm happy, I doubt we're going to hear any of that "O! tril-lil-lil-lolly" song in the film.

Jesus, I've written more than everyone else combined! Oh, it might be worth mentioning if you guys don't already know but check on the official Lord of the Rings film site on the 8th of December, apparently there's "something coming", maybe the announcement of who's playing Bilbo? DevilCow, I'm not disrespecting your opinion, some of what you say I agree with. Hope what I've said has put a few minds to rest, and hope I don't get banned for taking up a whole forum page with random fan speculation!


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