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SHARK NIGHT 3D Adds Four (Article) - 8/31/2010 8:24:13 AM

What they need is Sam Jackson:  I am M-F-in sick of these M-F-in sharks in this M-F-in fresh water!!

Which actually raises a question... is there any truly "fresh" water left in Louisiana?  Isn't it all either filled with the filth of New Orleans/Katrina or the oil from the Gulf spill?  I think we should just declare Louisiana a DMZ no man's land and move on.

Liebesman for CLASH Sequel (Article) - 8/31/2010 8:21:30 AM

WTF?!  A) it's a stand-alone story.  B) I thought this movie pretty much tanked at the box office.  How the F are they green-lighting a sequel?!  <sigh>

10 TV Actors We Want To See In More Movies (Article) - 8/27/2010 6:49:30 AM

Hanso, first off great article.  Second, congrats on moving from Maniac to Mania contributor!  And you've managed to do it all without smelling like lady-scented body wash.  Good job, sir!!

Heroes Season Four DVD Review (Article) - 8/27/2010 6:42:43 AM

Stormrider, I think by the time Season 4 got started, they had flubbed and completely f***ed up 2 out of 3 seasons.  Most people were beyond giving the show any more chances.  After the complete fiasco that was Season 2, I'm amazed that the show lasted a 4th season.  Season 3 just sucked out loud.

I loved Season 1, but the shows writers thought they were creating "LOST with Superheroes"... but without all the actually smart, well-developed characters and constant tension.  What a sad waste of opportunity.

LaBeouf Talks INDY 5 (Article) - 8/27/2010 6:37:16 AM

PLEASE, no more aliens!!

Renner Joins M:I IV (Article) - 8/27/2010 6:35:07 AM

If they want to do a re-boot, then ditch Cruise and actually try the "spy" thing rather than the "action movie with people who call themselves spies" thing.

The M:I franchise should run like Ocean's 11:  an ensemble cast with a complicated plan to gain some necessary information without being seen.

EXPENDABLES Wins Again (Article) - 8/24/2010 7:16:59 AM


PIRANHA 3D Movie Review (Article) - 8/24/2010 7:12:56 AM

Doublec, that would probably be the same moron that I saw take 3 kids (roughly 8, 5, and 2) to see "Wolfman" in the theaters last February.  Parents of the year, seriously.

BUGS BUNNY Film Coming (Article) - 8/15/2010 7:55:25 AM

I <3 Bugs Bunny!  But I'm not seeing how they can do a "live-action" version, unless we're talking about real people interacting with cartoon Bugs... and I'm pretty sure they've done that already with Space Jam and a couple others.

THE EXPENDABLES Review (Article) - 8/14/2010 9:45:28 AM

Okay, I went and saw this movie last night, and I have to say:  Rob is totally deluded and confused.  I'm not sure what kind of Shakespearean drama he was hoping for, but the movie kicked ass.  And I don't just mean in a Hanzo-esque "FUN" way.  I mean, the dialog was good (maybe Rob doesn't know this, but lots of guys, especially the ones who are in the military or similar life, have a serious problem expressing their emotions.  So seeing these guys try to connect when they have a hard time with it, didn't come off as painful or bad acting in any way to me).

The action was really good without being ridiculous.  The plot was exactly what I expected and IT WAS WHAT IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN:  an homage to movies like "Commando," "Rambo Part II," "Die Hard," and their ilk.  In other words, yes it was a stereotypical horde of bad guys ruling a banana republic island off the coast of Central America.  Our heroes go in and... well, they kill them.  All of them.  In loud and violent fashion.  On the way you learn a bit about the characters without getting bogged down into too much minutiae, enough to see them as fallible humans, not enough to turn it from action to drama.

Rob leaves out small bits like the fact that "Dolph Lundgrens Herculean efforts to assemble basic words and phrases" is because his character is a drug addict who is booted from the team for being so strung out that he's a liability.  And Mickey Rourke really channelled a man who fears that he's lost his soul.  The whole subplot of the movie was how does someone who has lived a life of violence redeem his soul?  Now, they don't berate that concept, but it's there and worth considering as the motivation for these men.

The movie is well worth a B grade, at least.  And that's not including the spectacular verbal tete-a-tete between Stallone and Schwarzenegger.  The lines in that scene alone were worth the price of admission.

Sorry, Rob, but after a couple strangely positive reviews from you, you have again replaced the corn cob in your posterior and issued a review that was not only excessively harsh, but not even entirely accurate to the film.  It's clear that you didn't WANT to like this movie when you went in to see it.


Date Joined: June 5, 2009