Tenjho Tenge volume 5 edits

[Natsume_Maya]

In addition to the edits posted (http://digitalsin.bebopboard.net/tenten/?page_id=9) on thedigitalsin's website, I would add the following:

Page 70, panel 2: bra strap added
Page 74, panel 4: shorts added

A couple of brand names and logos have been removed:
Page 84, panel 3: Sony name and logo and Tiffany & Co name deleted
Page 84, panel 4: Tiffany & Co name deleted
Page 84, panel 6: Sony name and logo and Tiffany & Co name deleted
Page 85, panel 3: Sony name and logo deleted
Page 177, panel 2: Sony name and logo deleted

Some edited panels have already been mentioned where bras are added. In addition to the drawing on bras, some of the panels also involve deleting nipples (ie the bras which are drawn on don't cover where the nipples are in the original artwork):
Page 26, panel 1
Page 27, panel 3
Page 28, panels 1 and 3
Page 71, panel 1
Page 72, panel 4
Page 73, panel 1

Finally, the translation has been toned down or changed in places, but I haven't had a chance to go through the text yet.

[Natsume_Maya]

I've done a quick review of the translation and make the following comments:

CENSORSHIP/TONING DOWN OF DIALOGUE

Page 12, panel 2-
Japanese version: Ho ho, and isn't that "Goldfish Shit/Droppings" Mitsuomi next to you? I see, you're attending Toudou too. Long time no see <3
CMX line: And hey, who's that standing behind you? Mitsuomi-kun, right? Oh, I get it! You're a freshman too! Long time no see, dog! <3
("Goldfish Droppings" changed to "dog".)

Page 64, panel 1-
Japanese: Shit!!
CMX line: ...Shaddup!!
(Toned down, although the use of "shaddup" is relevant in the context.)

Page 72, panel 3-
Japanese: Why are you sleeping with me/embracing me?
CMX line: Why are you doing this to me?
(Toned down.)

Page 75, panel 3-
CMX line: I'm askin', you find the guy who did this to me?
In the Japanese version, Ishimatsu uses "shit" instead of "guy".
(Toned down.)

Japanese: Shit!! Oy, shit!! You listening to me?!
CMX line: Hey, jerk-off, you listening to me?!
(Arguably toned down.)

Page 77, panel 3-
Japanese: You want me to report every little thing, like that I jerked off yesterday?
CMX line: What? You also wanna know what I did last night?
(Toned down.)

Page 78, panel 4-
Japanese: Shut up, or I'll rape you, bitch.
CMX: You got a big mouth. Best keep it closed unless you want real trouble.
(Toned down.)

Page 119, panel 4-
Japanese: Do you think shits like you could beat up Ishimatsu?!!
CMX line: It'd be a cold day in hell before a trio of wusses like you can take out Ishimatsu!!
(Toned down.)

Page 149, panel 4-
Japanese: One kick and the medical bill for my hand and damages!! If we settle things now I'll let you off with 20 rounds of titty-fucking.
CMX line: Let's settle up! You pay the medical bill for my hand... aaand I'll do you later!! All right, stop this second... I'll be satisfied with a naked body to body showdown.
(Toned down.)

Page 149, panel 5-
Japanese: Young lady, wait. Let us fuck.
CMX line: Come on Madam, wait up, and put out!
(Toned down.)

Page 150, panel 2-
Japanese: If we settle things now I can discount it to 15 rounds.
CMX line: This is my final offer!
(Toned down. The Japanese line is a reference to Bunshichi's earlier mention of 20 rounds of paizuri.)

Page 157, panel 3-
Japanese: Fuck you!!
CMX line: Screw you!!
(Toned down. The Japanese line is in English, so it was somehow "translated" into "screw you" /images/graemlins/tongue.gif )

Page 164, panel 1-
Japanese: Shit!!
CMX line: Lousy luck!!
(Toned down.)

Page 169, panel 2-
Japanese: I really... am a naive, stupid shit.
CMX line: Can't believe... how friggin' stupid and naive I am.
(Toned down.)

Page 179, panel 3-
Japanese: Shin... just now... what... did that Chinese guy mean!?
CMX line: Shin... what did he mean by that?!
(Reference to ethnicity removed.)

Page 214, panel 2-
CMX line: That's what I meant when I said I was prepared to die, fool!!
In the Japanese version, Bunshichi doesn't say "fool", but rather calls him "China".
(Reference to ethnicity removed.)

OTHER COMMENTS

Page 10, panel 4-
In the Japanese version, Sanada says "Pon!!" as he hits Maya. The CMX version leaves this as "Pon!", but also added the word "Jawbreaker!! at the bottom right hand corner of the pic (for no apparent reason).
(In mah jong, "pon" is a set of three of the same tiles.)

Page 12, panel 4-
In the Japanese version, Sanada calls himself "'Five Chun Red Mah Jong Demon' Sanada Masahiro". ("Chun" is the red tile in mah jong. There are four chun tiles in a whole set of mah jong tiles.)
In the CMX version, Sanada calls himself "Amano Ryukai, the Mahjong Fist". This is presumably because CMX erroneously named him Amano Ryukai in volume 4*, so they probably wanted to maintain consistency.

* In volume 4, the CMX version at page 211 has: Sanada saying "By the way, the name's Amano Ryukai... but they call me Mahjong Fist!". In fact, he was actually just declaring his fighting style: "Modified Amano Style, Mah Jong Fist".

However, at page 119, panel 2, CMX's translation then suddenly refers to "Sanada" instead of Amano (although the dialogue there still refers to him as "Mahjong Fist").

Page 20, panel 1-
Mitsuomi refers to Shin as "Shin-kun" in the CMX version when in the Japanese version he is "Shin-san". Yet in other places in the CMX version, Mitsuomi refers to Shin as "Shin-san".
(ie inconsistent use of honourifics.)

Page 42, panel 2-
When Masataka is describing how good Aya's food is, two lines are left out of the CMX version:
"(Mutou Tsuru[] discussion)"
"In (terms?) of Shou[] no Sushi" [I'm not sure of this line because one character was hard to read.]
Shou? no Sushi is a reference to the manga "Shouta no Sushi".
Mutou Tsuru? should be a reference to Mutou Tsurue, a food critic in the manga "Shouta no Sushi".

Page 51, panel 3-
For the past few panels, the ghost of Shin has been calling out "...aya..." but in this particular panel of the CMX version, Shin's ghost is suddenly calling "...aya's..." /images/graemlins/tongue.gif

Page 61, panel 2-
In the Japanese version Bunshichi talks about being 85% sure, but in the CMX version he is 95% sure.

Page 101, panel 4-
Japanese: Aya's bento is delicious, isn't it?
CMX line: How is it? I made it myself.
(Maya is talking. The identity of the cook has been changed for no apparent reason.)

Page 138, panel 2-
In the CMX version Shin says "The head of the Gaokishi clan greets thee..." as if Shin is the head, but in fact Shin is greeting the head of the Gaokishi clan.

Page 162, panel 2-
Japanese: You shouldn't refuse to take passengers. (Have you got an Echo Card?)
CMX: You're a cabbie. If somebody wants a lift, you stop. (You want me to complain to your boss?)
(An echo system is an electronic system for the visually impaired. The blind person carries an echo card with them. When they come within the vicinity of an echo box, the box can play a recorded voice message to help the blind person. Presumably in this case Bunshichi is asking whether the taxi driver is blind.)

Page 175, panel 3-
Japanese: Roll Hair had it.
CMX line: Take this GPS device, for instance...
(Bunshichi is talking of the wonders of tracking systems and, in the Japanese version is referring to the fact that Roll Hair (ie Emi) had a tracker on her. The CMX version is slightly dumbed down to make it express that it's a GPS device he's holding.)

Page 176, panel 4-
The name of the Chinese character in the series is phonetically spelt "Fu Chie In" in Japanese, but should actually be written "Hu Xie Yin" in Chinese. In the CMX version, his name is rendered "Fu Chien".

I hope to post up comments on the translation of volume 6 soon...

[Natsume_Maya]

I've scanned the edited pages for volumes 5 and 6 (Japanese and CMX editions) and have contacted digitalsin about them.

[Puppet Master]

Wow so the edits are becoming even more pointless now even small details that can cause no problems are being changed. I really wish someone else had it or CMX would leave it as it should be oh well.