The third season cast of ROSWELL
© 2001 UPN

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April 15 April 21: Goodbye ROSWELL

Of course, this isn't the first time ROSWELL has been given its walking papers. The WB canned the show after one season, but a very loyal and vocal fan base petitioned the network to give the show another shot. The WB relented, but after another low-rated season, it told ROSWELL to hit the road.

Then UPN picked it up, but the show continued to struggle in the ratings despite the BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER lead-in. UPN had pulled the show off the schedule multiple times, and cast members had been released from their contracts earlier this year.

The final four episodes of ROSWELL will begin airing April 23 at 9 p.m. and the series finale will air May 14. And you can catch ROSWELL in syndication on the Sci Fi Channel.

Unlike many other shows that are yanked off network schedules after only two or three episodes like, say, THE TICK, ROSWELL was given more than enough chances to attract viewers.

I guess people just aren't interested in young, beautiful aliens and their problems. They're way more interested in sitcoms about talking babies.

So anyway, let me break down the week for you. Oh, and as always, check your local listings.

Monday, April 15

It's all about revenge in tonight's all-new ANGEL (WB, 9 p.m.) when Angel goes after Wesley for kidnapping Connor and turning him over to the bad guys.

Gear up

The cast of GREG THE BUNNY - clockwise from top: Count Blah, Bob Gunton as Junction Jack, Sarah Silverman as Alison Kaiser, Warren Demontague, Seth Green as Jimmy Bender, Greg, Dina Waters as Dottie Sunshine, and Eugene Levy as Gil Bender.

© 2002 Fox

Check out THE POWERPUFF GIRLS and JUSTICE LEAGUE tonight starting at 8 p.m. on the Cartoon Network. You won't be sorry.

Sexy witches alert! HBO has got THE CRAFT at 8:45 p.m.

Tired of all the reality shows? Then you might want to check out the film SERIES 7: THE CONTENDERS on STARZ! at 9 p.m. It follows the escapades of game-show contestants who must literally kill their fellow competitors to win. If only it were real and involved REAL WORLD people.

TUESDAY, april 16

Buffy tries to figure out why Spike can hit her even with that chip in his head in this rerun of BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER (UPN at 8 p.m.). A second episode of BUFFY airs at 9 p.m. It's the one in which Buffy gets the job at the Doublemeat Palace.

Andy and his friends seeks revenge against their penny-pinching company is tonight's all-new ANDY RICHTER CONTROLS THE UNIVERSE (Fox, 8:30 p.m.).

Clark comes into contact with a kid who can read minds in tonight's all-new SMALLVILLE (WB, 9 p.m.). If Clark has half a brain he will take that kid to Vegas.

It's 7 p.m. to 8 p.m. in tonight's all-new 24 (Fox, 9 p.m.) and Dennis Hopper shows up as the top bad guy. Finally.

Check out THE POWERPUFF GIRLS and SAMURAI JACK on the Cartoon Network starting at 8 p.m.

Comedy Central has got the super cool RUSHMORE at 8 p.m.

WeDNESDAY, april 17

T'Pol, Hoshi

One of the more memorable lycanthropes from THE HOWLING

© 2001 MGM Home Entertainment

The secret wolfen community of WOLF LAKE (UPN, 9 p.m.) gather to elect a new Alpha Male, and of course, there is much controversy when some of them accidentally vote for Pat Buchanan.

Excellent! VH1 has got BILL & TED'S EXCELLENT ADVENTURE at 9 p.m.

A man with a compromising tape of Dottie blackmails his way on the show in tonight's all-new GREG THE BUNNY (Fox, 9:30 p.m.).

Check out the true story of Scorpion King in THE SCORPION KING UNVEILED on the Discovery Channel at 8 p.m. Although I'm sure that upcoming movie with The Rock is completely accurate.

Comedy Central has got SOUTH PARK at 10 p.m. Sweeeet!

THURSDAY, april 18

Brian and Stewie travel cross country together in tonight's all-new THE FAMILY GUY (Fox, 8 p.m.).

Peggy nominates Bobby to carry the Olympic torch through Arlen, but it's Hank that's the chosen one in this rerun of KING OF THE HILL (Fox, 9 p.m.).

Jimmy dates a girl whose dog likes to munch on bunny puppets in this rerun of GREG THE BUNNY (Fox, 8:30 p.m.).

Andy gets yet another officemate in this repeat of ANDY RICHTER CONTROLS THE UNIVERSE (Fox, 9:30 p.m.). Unfortunately, the new guy's name is Andy too, which results in everyone in the office calling our boy Andy "big Andy," "large Andy," and "wide Andy."

A big time casino owner is killed in this repeat of CSI: CRIME SCENE INVESTIGATION (CBS, 9 p.m.). Hey, sometimes the house loses.

Paige gets the ol' bloodsucker treatment when she's turned into a vampire in tonight's all-new CHARMED (WB, 8 p.m.). Is this an attempt to attract BUFFY fans? I bet it is.

FRIDAY, april 19

Hal takes on the boys in basketball in this rerun of MALCOLM IN THE MIDDLE (Fox, 8:30 p.m.).

Logan's Eyes Only compound is attacked in tonight's all-new DARK ANGEL (Fox, 9 p.m.).

After Washington, D.C., is beset by a series of unexplained attacks, Turner joins forces with the Department of Defense to hunt down the culprits in tonight's all-new STRANGE WORLD (Sci Fi Channel, 8 p.m.).

To counter Scorpius's threat to annihilate Earth, Crichton conspires with his shipmates to destroy the Peacekeeper Command Carrier and all the wormhole data aboard in tonight's FARSCAPE (Sci Fi Channel, 9 p.m.).

Alien invaders plotting to obliterate Earth open their campaign with an attack on Japan, and it falls to the reluctant Lexx gang to thwart the assault in tonight's LEXX (Sci Fi Channel, 10 p.m.).

A captured adult survivor of the Big Death reveals secrets about Markus and the Valhalla Sector in tonight's all-new JEREMIAH (Showtime, 10:45 p.m.).

I wanted to unleash hell when GLADIATOR (HBO, 8 p.m.) won the Best Picture Oscar in 2001 over such better films as TRAFFIC and CROUCHING TIGER, HIDDEN DRAGON.

SATURDAY, april 20

A disgraced tanker pilot races to right a tragic wrong from his past as two out-of-control forest fires threaten to level an Oregon community in the made-for-TV movie SUREFIRE (ABC, 9 p.m.). It's like BACKDRAFT, but outside in a forest, and without the good cast, and, well, it's got fire in it like BACKDRAFT.

Kick ass

SERIES 7: THE CONTENDERS

© 2001 USA Entertainment

I'm only mentioning this because I know there are some die-hard fans of naked chicks out there, so here we go: VH1 has got the infamous SHOWGIRLS at 9 p.m.

If you love WOLF LAKE then you'll love the flick THE HOWLING (Encore, 8:30 p.m.).

On a similar note, if you love werewolves then you'll love Nicholas Cage in, well anything, but more specifically THE ROCK on USA at 8 p.m.

SUNDAY, april 21

Original STAR TREK cast members spoof their series - and Trekkies - in the fourth-season finale of FUTURAMA (Fox, 7 p.m.).

Oblivious to its cult-like ways, Luanne joins a sorority and gets Peggy in too in tonight's all-new KING OF THE HILL (Fox, 7:30 p.m.).

Flashback alert! The Springfield Friars Club roasts Homer, with emcee Krusty the Clown introducing friends, family and their memories from past episodes in tonight's THE SIMPSONS (Fox, 8 p.m.).

Call it 11 angry men and Lois. A contentious Lois deadlocks deliberations as a jury member in tonight's all-new MALCOLM IN THE MIDDLE (Fox, 8:30 p.m.).

In an episode humorously titled "Jump the Shark" the agents ask the Lone Gunmen to help find their friendly foe Yves Adele Harlow after former Area 51 worker Morris Fletcher claims she's a "super soldier" in tonight's THE X-FILES (Fox, 9 p.m.). I think we all know THE X-FILES jumped the shark about two seasons ago.

A biker gang celebrates a funeral at the Fisher's on Christmas Day in tonight's all-new SIX FEET UNDER (HBO, 9 p.m.).

Sloane's wife lets Syd in on a little secret and puts her own life on the line in the process in tonight's all-new  ALIAS (ABC, 9 p.m.).

UPN is giving you a second chance to catch last Wednesday's ENTERPRISE tonight at 9 p.m.

Remote Patrol is our weekly Television column.