BLOODSTONE #1

This quippy chick ain't no Vampire Slayer

By Michael David     October 31, 2001

The problem with the success of BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER, as with the success of just about anything in entertainment, is that it inspires countless others to produce their own thinly veiled rip-offs in the desperate hope that the glorious glow will rub off on them. But audiences, surprisingly enough, can be a bit more discerning than that, and rarely do these "homages" last...or so we hope. In the case of BUFFY, there have been several shows that have tried to capture the same blend of mystical mayhem and sharp scripting, and despite the inexplicable survival of CHARMED, BUFFY remains mostly unique. But television is only one medium, and there are so many others where writers can steal a premise with impunity. Welcome to the world of comics and BLOODSTONE.

Reading the first issue of Marvel's new horror title, a follow-up of sorts to the exploits of one of their more obscure '70s adventurers, one is almost tempted to curse Joss Whedon for making the world safe for people who think they can write hipster blonde teenaged girls with a plethora of pop culture references at the ready and a powerful spin-kick. Elsa Bloodstone is a young girl with a very annoying attitude I think she's supposed to come off as delightfully light-hearted and modern, but she just seems like an idiot who has returned with her mother from an extended stay in England. It seems Elsa's father has died and it's time for her to learn something of her inheritance. So it's back to the US and the Bloodstone mansion, where destiny awaits her. And oh yes, Elsa keeps having dreams in which she wears Buffy's clothes and beats up vampires. Can the two situations be connected? And why is Frankenstein's Monster lumbering around wearing a smiley face and a Yankees cap?

Tedious is perhaps the best word to describe this debut issue. It reeks of other, better characters and stories, and it adds so little of its own. Within a few pages, I found myself desperately hoping that this Elsa Bloodstone would trip down a staircase and end our misery, but alas, her wide-eyed moronic stare, countless murmured asides and forced media references are here to stay. Elsa will of course discover that her father, the great Ulysses Bloodstone, Monster Hunter, has left her a legacy that will doom her to take up the family crusade, but the meager bits and pieces of past Marvel continuity cannot disguise the true origin of this uninteresting premiere. Curse you, Joss Whedon why did you have to make something so damned good?

BLOODSTONE

Grade: D

Issue: No. 1

Author(s): Dan Abnett, Andy Lanning, Michael Lopez, Scott Hanna

Publisher: Marvel Comics

Price: $2.99