Greeting Cinescapers! Let's just say this old TV junkie is happier then they day they cancelled SAVED BY THE BELL! Why you don't ask? Well I'll tell you anyway! Because it's too darn hot to do anything but stay in my air conditioned trailer watching TV!
It may sound like nothing in this season of re-runs, but it allows me to catch up on all the shows I've missed and all the DVDs I've bought compulsively, without regard to the alimony checks I've failed to send.
So rather then talk about all the money I lost backing Vin Diesel's career or something else related to television, I'll just list the shows I think you should watch this week and ask all readers, regardless of if they're an ex-wife or not, to write me atTVWasteland@Cinescape.com
MONDAY, JUNE 14
SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS (8 pm, NIK) Spongebob paints Mr. Krab's living room with the level of competence one would expect from a talking sponge. (Repeat)
AIR BUD SPIKES BACK (8 pm, DISN) A vollyball playing dog takes up crime fighting as well. Is there anything thing Air Bud can't do?
YOUNG DR. KILDARE/CALLING DR. KILDARE/THE SECRET OF DR. KILDARE/ DR. KILDARE GOES HOME/DR. KILDARE'S CRISIS/DR. KILDARE'S STRANGE CASE/DR. KILDARE'S WEDDING DAY/THE PEOPLE VS. DR. KILDARE/DR.KILDARE'S VICTORY (8 pm, TCM) Whole lot of Dr. Kildare on TCM tonight.
CSI: MIAMI (10 pm, CBS) A killed cop is claimed crooked until Horatio sets things straight. (Repeat)
TUESDAY, JUNE 15
FOOTLOOSE (9 pm, VH1) In a town that prohibits dancing, renegade teens flagrently disregard the law. All are shot.
FLETCH LIVES (10 pm, AMC) An American movie classic.
MR. BLANDINGS BUILDS HIS DREAM HOUSE (10 pm, TCM) Cary Grant movies his family to rural Connecticut, where he buys a house that needs fixing up. Hilarity ensues.
WENSDAY, JUNE 16
ROCKY II (7:30 pm, AMC) Because heavyweight champions have nothing better to do then demand rematches with non-professional fighters.
THE SIMPLE LIFE 2: ROAD TRIP (8 pm, FOX)
STAR TREK: ENTERPRISE (8 pm, UPN) The crew battles zombies. (Repeat)
BEETHOVEN (8 pm, FAM) A St. Bernard upstages Charles Grodin, no surprise there.
THURSDAY, JUNE 17
CSI: MIAMI (8 pm, CBS) Horatio suspects revenge is the motive for a murder. Nice thinking Horatio. (Repeat)
CSI: CRIME SCENE INVESTIGATION (9 pm, CBS) A suspects remains are found in several trash cans, sounds like a real cut up. (Repeat)
TRU CALLING (9 pm, FOX) Tru's attempt to save a gunshot victim result in a second victim. (Repeat)
SABOTEUR (9:30 pm, TCM) Thanks to Nazi spies, cold fish Robert Cummings scores with hot dish Priscilla Lane. Oh, and a criminal falls off the Statue of Liberty.
WITHOUT A TRACE (10 pm, CBS) A ex-cop bounty hunter disappears after being shot. The team finds her in the morgue. (Repeat)
FRIDAY, JUNE 18
PHANTOMS (8 pm, UPN) Peter O'Toole collects a check.
JOAN OF ARCADIA (8 pm, CBS) Joan starts jumping rope because God tells her to. (Repeat)
JAWS: THE REVENGE (8 pm, AMC) An American movie classic.
STARGATE SG-1 (9 pm, SCIFI) 1) Crybaby Daniel needs O'Neill to rescue him from Central America. 2) An unstoppable foe chases Carter. (Repeats)
THE ADVENTURES OF ROBIN HOOD (10:30 pm, TCM) An outlaw robs from the rich to give to the poor. One prays the police lock this criminal up.
SATURDAY, JUNE 19
JAWS (8 pm, BRAVO) Killer shark lowers the property value of a New England island.
DIE ANOTHER DAY (8 pm, SHOW) [IMG1L}James Bond saves the world yet again.
ONCE UPON A TIME IN THE WEST (8 pm, AMC) A former prostitute with a heart of gold is helped by an outlaw and a mysterious stranger.
SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE (11:30 pm, NBC) Donald Trump hosts and Toots & the Maytals play music.
SUNDAY, JUNE 20
SALEM'S LOT (8 pm, TNT) Vampires
THE SIMPSONS (8 pm, FOX) Homer becomes Pie Man and fights crime. (Repeat)
THE GREAT OUTDOORS (8 pm, FAM) Comedy giants Dan Aykroyd and John Candy team up in a film free of laughs.
HARUM SCARUM (10:30 pm, TCM) Elvis Presley in a Harum. It made millions of dollars.
And with that we say bye bye. So until the next week, keep re-reading this article and write me letters as TVWasteland@cinescape.com
TV Wasteland is our weekly Television column. No vampires were staked as a result of this column.