Mania Grade: C+
Disc Grade: A-
Reviewed Format: DVD
Rated: Not Rated
Stars: COUNTRY CUZZINS - Rene Bond, John Tull, Debbie Osborne, Jack Richeson, George "Buck" Flower; MIDNIGHT PLOWBOY - John Tull, Nan Cee, Jack Richeson, Debbie Osborne
Writer: Bethel Buckalew
Director: Bethel Buckalew
Distributor: Something Weird Video / Image Entertainment
Original Years of Release: COUNTRY CUZZINS - 1970; MIDNIGHT PLOWBOY - 1973
Retail Price: $24.99
Extras: shorts; trailers; galleries; Easter eggs

Buy it now!

Related Links

0

COUNTRY CUZZINS / MIDNIGHT PLOWBOY

Persons perplexed with the overwhelming attention placed upon the pleasing Rene Bond might just find themselves converting to the choir after attending a screening of the sizzling sex-fest COUNTRY CUZZINS, in which the irresistible damsel, in pre-augmented form, proves herself the most pleasing of personalities and the warmest little critter around. Why, her antics and infectious smile will warm your heart and turn your pants into a pop-up book.

The Peabodys, a collection of corn fed country bumpkins, are up to their old caressing ways when suddenly the matriarch, Grandma Peabody, calls them for a serious discussion. Seems Grandma Peabody has caught on to something called "death" (must be French) and thinks that with her limited time left it's about time the family had a reunion. Well, enter Prudence, a snob from the city with nothing Dear about her. Prudence is the proverbial stick in the mud until a bit of good old country moonshine loosens her up and she has the time of her life. In her drunken stupor she invites the Peabodys to come visit her and quickly regrets it. Wishing to back out of the deal, a friend offers the idea of allowing them to come up so they can make fun of them. Things degenerate, or should I say regenerate, into an orgy of the sexual proclivities kind.

COUNTRY CUZZINS is not going to win any Oscars but for what it is, a raunchy T&A grind fest, it's rather charming. More narrative driven than the usual hillbilly features, the film actually builds some semblance of characters before having them fake pork one another. Shining above all is the radiant Ms. Bond, who may not be the most beautiful creature on earth, but certainly seems amongst the sweetest, as Billie Jo. Making a guest appearance is the great George "Buck" Flower (VIDEO VIXENS a.k.a. BLACK SOCKS, a must see) as a randy talent scout who gives the full casting couch treatment to Ms. Bond, with fake, unconvincing style.

Though supposedly directed by Bethel Buckalew, the film was actually helmed by KISS ME QUICK's own Peter Perry, an auteur whose legendary "Junior" saga's second installment, MIDNIGHT PLOWBOY, is available on this very same disc.

You might remember Junior (John Tull) as the randy little cow humper in the classic SASSY SUE. Well, due to a thing I like to call "The Universal horror film continuity phenomenon," things are a little different this time. Rather than reflect on the man/cow love affair which at the tail end of SASSY SUE looked like it was going to end in matrimony this Junior installment has him off to Hollywood with no means of support. Junior is so nice that a couple of stoners give him the address to a bordello where he is initially mistaken for an exceptionally randy customer. Once things are straightened out the madam (Played by the multi-talented Nan Cee) gives Junior a job and a place to stay and he affectionately refers to her as mom. Soon Junior is driving the company van around town, picking up Johns for the girls and allowing them to do their work in the back. All seems well except for two things: a rival pimp is upset about the territory breach and Junior falls in love with one of the prostitutes.

Clocking in at a brief 70 minutes, and feeling about 40, MIDNIGHT PLOWBOY (hmmm, I wonder why they called it that?) is a fun little bump and grind ride that's a tad on the heavy side without crossing the line into hardcore. While attempts at pathos are tried, the overall structure of the film and its general function (wank fest) make such flourishes both unnecessary and distracting. Instead of Junior revealing his mother's death to the madam the film might have been better off having the madam simply say, "Hey Junior, why don't you go off and have sex with ten of these hookers at once... oh, and take these oversized sex aides with you." Perhaps the subplot of Junior's falling in love with the prostitute could be replaced with the subplot of nonsensical gratuitous sex scenes featuring comely ladies in a variety of semi-explicit positions. I know these ideas come too late, but for soft core (or as we like to call it, lame core) filmmakers today it's something to consider. One final note: MIDNIGHT PLOWBOY features a genuinely hysterical scene in which a wife performs fellatio on our young hero in the backseat of a car while her husband, who is driving, starts talking about his gun collection; a true moment of Chaplain-esque brilliance.

It's tame-o-rama with the three shorts added to this disc's brew. "Naked Moonshine" is about a bunch of girls who are preparing for a party by watering down moonshine and for some reason need to be topless. "Harriet's Chariot" is an old coin drop arcade loop short of a naked girl on a farm, bending over and doing all in her power to make sure something is obstructing the forbidden crotch area. Ends with a rather incongruous seesaw segment that features an even more attractive lady. "Forever Angler" is another coin drop arcade loop, this time with a fishing motif. I hate give away the endings, but the film closes with the girl catching a can. Sorry, sometimes the twists are just too impressive to keep quite.

Trailers are featured for other films in this Ma and Pa Kettle rip-off series. You'll get ones for COUNTRY HOOKER (my all time favorite film!!!), THE PIGKEEPER'S DAUGHTER, SASSY SUE, SOUTHERN COMFORTS, and TOBACCO ROODY, plus segments for the two featured presentations.

Not one, but two Easter Eggs await your discovery on this disc. One features a voluptuous-plus hillbilly stripper with a pair a sizable moonshine jugs, and the other a simu-sex clip from MIDNIGHT PLOWBOY.

Not featured on this disc are liner notes from Vince Bonavoglia, whose informative scribbles on this disc's companion piece THE PIGKEEPER'S DAUGHTER / SASSY SUE were both informative and hysterical. (By the way, do check out his wonderful prose on DVDmaniacs.net; highly informative and entertaining.)

Rounding out the disc are two galleries, one featuring Harry Novak Exploitation Art with Radio-Spot Rarities and the other a gallery of Exploitation Photos.