DOCTOR WHO: MAD DOGS AND ENGLISHMEN

By: Richard Salter
Date: Wednesday, September 18, 2002

For once, it is very accurate to judge a book by its cover. Not only does this one inform us that this is the 100th BBC DOCTOR WHO Novel, which is pretty impressive in itself, but also the poodle smoking a cigarette and holding a ray gun is a clue. If that doesn't tell you what you're in for, get a load of the color. Paul Magrs, one of the shining lights of the BBC's DOCTOR WHO range and a writer who refuses to be categorized, delivers a novel that is both infuriating and yet impossible to put down.

The Tolkien-like Professor Reginald Tyler has spent his life writing a book called "The True History of Planets", and hotshot director John Fuchas has made a movie based on his work that's causing quite a stir on the planet of the poodles. This is because the book and movie have become the story of how the Queen of the Dogworld was overthrown, instead of the epic tale of swords and sorcery the Doctor was expecting. After arriving at an amusing future reversal of a science fiction convention, in a scene featuring perhaps the funniest TARDIS landing in DOCTOR WHO history, the Doctor is sure of one thing: somebody has tampered with Tyler's book. To find out who and why, he despatches Fitz to 1960's Las Vegas, Anji to 1970's Hollywood and himself to the early twentieth century, where Professor Tyler and his "Smudgelings" meet every Monday evening to discuss their literary pursuits.

Both Anji and the Doctor are teamed with talking poodles, who must take on the silent role of pets while on Earth. Fitz, on the other hand, is teamed with the imposing figure of Flossie, the cook at the hotel hosting the sci-fi convention. Flossie is perhaps the most loveable of Magrs's menagerie of characters. Her scenes with the cowardly Fitz are a joy, given the marked difference in her new-found attitude to time travel and adventuring, while Fitz would rather be gambling.

MAD DOGS is gloriously ridiculous, effortlessly outrageous and terrific fun to read. The plot zips along so fast it barely pauses for breath. In fact, the one downside is that there are so many characters and so many things happening, the story sometimes threatens to lose its audience. The fact that nearly everything makes some kind of bizarre sense in the end, even when too many people are all trying to have a hand (or paw) in the resolution, is testament to Magrs's juggling skills and his always readable prose. I was often trying to guess if this next new character was someone I should recognize, and this book plays with this expectation brilliantly, letting me think I'd guessed it only to pull the rug out.

From the fully carpeted space station to the unfortunate dish Flossie once prepared for the lobster people of Karim, MAD DOGS is a book that knows how to have fun, which is after all what DOCTOR WHO is all about.

Reviewer Richard Salter is the editor of the popular DOCTOR WHO fanzine, MYTH MAKERS.

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