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Flip This "House of Usher"

10/15/2010 5:49:56 PM permalink

Why Is It I Hear Lady Gaga Singing "Alejandro..."

As I've continued to grow increasingly disinterested in mainstream Hollywood I've made it an ever subtle quest to find something else to embrace and, hopefully, enjoy.

Questioning Maelstrom and other Maniacs on the topic of anime was the first major step I took in changing the directional winds which blew me into Japan. Some of it has been very successful ("Ouran High School Host Club," "Full Metal Alchemist, FMA: Brotherhood," "Maburaho," "Final Fantasy Advent Children,") and some has not ("Godannar!").

But that's the nature of this beast -- I have to rely on outside voices, my own natural curiosity, and my possibly sharp instincts or lack thereof.

I keep a wishlist of movies online at Amazon as I encounter them, and the same goes for the more unique offerings at TLA Video dot com. They've divided their offerings into the worlds of smut (all male,boy\girl, etc.), indie\cult, and mainstream Hollywood\etc.

Outside the adult offerings, the Hollywood standards (which are way overpriced, by the way), and some often really, really weird crap in the cult section, I took to the non-adult, not exactly heterosexual movie offerings that were available.

Oddly enough, some of those offered in the queer cinema section was mainstream Hollywood movies, but promoted from a dramatically different angle. "Alexander Revisited," "Troy," "Brokeback Mountain" and such are given the OMG! HE'S NAKED promotional angle, which shouldn't surprise me.

Also in this lot was the Australian indie flick "Newcastle," which was promoted in the above style mentioned and as "gay friendly," which really wasn't the deciding factor here. "Newcastle" was a coming of age surf flick, and it was more so the surf flick aspect that appealed to me as it was the middle of winter and, as I can't swim and I'm never going to lay bare foot upon surfboard, it would be a good way of living vicariously through someone else's eyes in paradise.

I've done what I can to champion "Newcastle." Plus the young man who portrayed Riley in "Eclipse" shows off earlier acting chops as the lead character's younger brother Fergus in "Newcastle."

I ordered a second surf movie in that particular shipment, but it was so effing weird in nature at times I'm just not even going to acknowledge it.

...And When Did Abercrombie & Fitch Start Making Horror Movies?

I keep scanning the same sections in TLA and found, of all things, an updated version of "The Fall of the House of Usher," simply re-titled Edgar Allan Poe's "House of Usher."

"Usher" and "Newcastle" have something in common -- they feature guys not wearing shirts on the front cover. Again, not exactly the selling point I'm searching for. To paraphrase a bad Tom Cruise outing, they had me at Edgar Allan Poe.

I wrote the name down and searched for it on Best Buy's kiosk's. Hey, they've got a copy for sale online, and for seven or eight bucks cheaper than TLA. I purchased a gift card, went home, and had it sent to my house.

It arrived last Wednesday, and I sat down and watched it.

Poe is one of those authors you can discern their original style from imitators and wannabe's. Dr. Seuss is another such author. "Usher" opened with an obviously Poe composed stretch of words which failed to match the image being presented.

The narrator speaks of how the Usher residence is crumbling, but the chosen location looks nothing like the decrepit property being described -- that was the first strike against this version.

Another blow came in the fact that, as I put it to one of my friends, just because you can put a bunch of good looking guys in front of a camera and direct them doesn't necessarily mean you should. Hell there wasn't one male individual cast in this film for his acting abilities. I silently wonder if their screen tests went along the lines of "take your clothes off and look pretty -- great, you've got the job."

The third blow is the one delivered by my own creative kick start I was briefly given by watching this while also considering how this could've been made better. And there was a notion that had occurred to me. There was a chance for some really dark and obsessive happenings to take place, but most of those notions are filtered through my dad's death earlier this year and how I've had to step up in his absence, even with my physical limitations.

I've never read Poe's original work, but I hope to do so soon. As for this update, I'll only say this: if you're looking for something that has guys half naked most of the time and two of them making out in the first ten minutes or so, then this is for you.

If you actually want a good movie, go find yourself a copy of "Newcastle." And if you're into man candy, well so much the better for you.

PS - If you do order "Newcastle" from TLA, be prepared to receive the all male catalog in your shipment, which contains explicit images from their adult offerings. If such viewing options aren't your cup of tea, get it from Amazon. You have been duly warned.

Tags: house of usher, edgar allan poe, newcastle, movies


Showing items 1 - 2 of 2
karas1 3/13/2011 6:00:22 AM

Never read Poe?  Get thee to a library!

I think my favorite Poe story is The Masque Of The Red Death.  Very wierd stuff.  And, of course, The Cask Of Amontillido (sp?)  Be careful who you trust.

zipahead 7/21/2011 8:48:20 AM

There's nothing about any naked guys making out in "The fall of the houseof Usher"...this sounds like an abomination.



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Date Joined: March 17, 2008