Call me a wuss. I just had no desire to fight the insane crowds of STAR WARS freaks... er, fanatics on opening weekend. I just didn't have a Force-driving desire to rush out and see it, nor to pick up any of the CLONES (sorry, STAR WARS: EPISODE II ATTACK OF THE CLONES) toys from Hasbro. Maybe it was the letdown from PHANTOM MENACE, or the super-high I was on from SPIDER-MAN. Either way, my life did not become a universe of Lucasness.
But then this past weekend after driving all over Jersey (don't get me started on N.J.'s lack of highway signs...) for a theater playing CLONES, I finally found one. And watched it. Now, I'm not going to give you yet another review here, except to say that I enjoyed it. Good flick, not great. Nuff said. But the one thing I will tell you about the movie is this: Don't mess with the muppet. Yes, Yoda kicked ass! He absolutely made that film. It's worth your money just to see his big fight scene.
So after walking out of the theater, my first comment was, "I've got to buy a YODA figure." Of course it was like 11 p.m., and for some crazy reason, no toy store is open that late. So I waited till the next day and hit like three or four Toys R Uses (or whatever the hell the plural of Toys R Us is...) and not a one of them had a YODA figure. They did have a cool R2-D2 that lights up and makes funky beeping noises though. So I hit a few more regular market chains like Target and still no YODA.
Now I don't know if I was just having bad luck, if YODA is so unbelievably popular that he's snatched up before he's even put on the racks or what. All I know is I couldn't find one. Personally, I think Lucas is behind the whole thing. He's probably still sore that I didn't rush out opening weekend.
Sigh. Guess I'll have to make it up to the big guy when STAR WARS: EPISODE III HERE COMES THE BAD GUY hits theaters in a couple of years.
Okay, so Fox is cancelling its Jessica Alba-starring DARK ANGEL TV show. Once you've wiped your tears away, put on that happy face, because Art Asylum refuses to go quietly into that dark night. The company is still releasing its action figures this August. Fans will still be able to get their claws on a MAX figure, based on the character's return in the second season, with a long mane and some nifty accessories like a grappling hook, backpack, harness and extra set of hands. The MAX DELUXE SET features the heroine with shorter hair, a kick-ass motorcycle (with a fly wheel mechanism and working headlight), pair of slick shades and an extra set o' hands. If sales are positive, Art Asylum may release a second wave including LOGAN and JOSHUA.
This year's holiday gifts will be unreal. Or make that UNREAL. Based on the insanely popular kill-em-till-they're-really-dead video game from Epic Games, toy company Radioactive Clown will be producing action figures based on UNREAL TOURNAMENT 2003 and UNREAL CHAMPIONSHIP. Look for deadly characters like MOTHER VIGILANCE, DAMARUS, GORGE and WMR-0333.
Break out the sake, McFarlane's going anime-crazy again. This time, McFarlane Toys is bringing the characters from ONIMUSHA 2: SAMURAI'S DESTINY to plastic life. Based on the Capcom sequel to one of the PS2's best-selling games of all time, DESTINY features warriors, quests, demons, puzzles and the standard pillaging hordes from feudal Japan. Available in August, the toy line features YAGYU JUBEI, OYU FROM ODANI, FUMA KOTARO, SAIGA MAGOICHI, ODA NOBUNAGA and GOGANDANTES.
Now why didn't they have toys like this when I was a kid?!? Based on the award-winning actress (read: porn star), comes a new and exciting exclusive variant: JENNA IN GLOW-IN-THE-DARK COSTUME. Limited to just 1,000 figures, this Toyzz.com exclusive will be available this summer. Sorry, kids you've gotta be 18 and over to purchase this... er, anatomically correct figure.
ON THE SHELVES
By now you've seen the SPIDER-MAN movie like 18 times, right? Sweet. Now run out to your local toy store and check out the latest 12" action figures from Toy Biz. SPIDER-MAN, MARY JANE and GREEN GOBLIN all feature real nice articulation, sculpting and cloth outfits.
And if you're looking to bring the box-office battle to your toy collection, pick up Hasbro's 12" JANGO FETT figure, and have him take on your 12" Spidey figs. Mr. Fett comes with all sorts of cool weapons and accessories like chrome pistols, utility pouches, a belt, jetpack, grappling hook, serrated gauntlet blades and more.
Go Figure is our weekly Toys and Action Figure column.
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