Trazalca
05-17-2006, 09:58 AM
Just, simply no words....
Ghostbusters in Hell (http://www.cinescape.com/0/editorial.asp?aff_id=0&this_cat=Movies&action=page&type_id=&cat_id=270338&obj_id=51268)
...okay. Shock's over. I got some words for this one. :romy:
:angry
You know what? That's it. I give up.
The soul sucking machine that is Hollywood has won.
This is beyond the sickening black plague that is sequel-itis.
This is sacrilege. This is defamatory. It's asinine.
It's makes crossing the streams nothing more than a fly-fishing mishap.
Dan Aykroyd wrote the script. Yee-haa. What a streak of success he's having now.
Just how many irons in the fire do you have there now Dan?
Let's see- three more sequels for The Blues Brothers, 5 more for
Ghostbusters, with rumors that you first thought of NINE, but decided
to cut back to 6 due to lack of special effects know-how availability?
Wow Dan! You're practically a script writing empire unto itself!
A veritable icon among script-writers! Oh please share with us,
O illustrious maven of sci-fi comedic geniuses - where do you get your muse?
What animals from the NYC sewers have been dug up and
sacrificed at your altar to appease you and make you keep writing?
What potholes, I mean PLOTholes have you refused to fill, O'master?
Will it be THE script according to prophecy, O master Dan?
The one that has the largest plothole in the history of Hollywood?
The one that has a hole so large, the entire screenplay is practically nothing more than a ring?
One ring to rule them all? One ring to hook and reel them?
One ring to take our money, and in a darkened theater steal them?
Yes master Dan! Yes! This is the ONE! The one that will bring a sign
of the end times. Where for those that paid good money to see it
will leave the theaters with weeping and gnashing of teeth!
Dogs and cats living together! Mass hysteria! Genius!
Dan, how do you do it? You made a script that inspired Harold Ramis
to speak in tongues throughout all remaining press junkets and promo
tours for this movie.
You made Bill Murray even THAT much more a respected actor for his
continued refusal to participate in production for this travesty,
while simultaneously lowering the comedic respect for Ben Stiller,
making his past efforts on the screen relegated to classics of comedy
of a bygone era.
So Dan. The royalties from past gems like Nothing But Trouble and Dragnet
must keep you rolling in it, huh? Dare I ask- you got plans for sequels for
them too, don'tcha? Ha! I knew it! Your prolific fire amazes me!
Can't keep a good thing from dying, can you Dan?
On no you can't. What else is gonna pay for your next film productions?
It's a never ending vicious cycle and you're a slave to it.
Why do you keep writing in the hopes of resurrecting the ghosts of past glories?
If only someone had the chutzpah to cross the streams over
YOUR work, so such a concept would be locked away and NEVER HAPPEN.
Why o WHY can you not think of anything coherent?
Was is something you took in the 70's that's finally caught up with
your brain to dementalize your imaginations and warp them to a level
of idiocy that could only be entertaining to the lower depths where
the Hollywood executives dwell?..... Aha! I got it! That's it!
You speak their language you ignorant slut!
You know the vernacular of their misbegotten and misguided plots
used to dumb down the world with, eating so much rotted and fetid
cafeteria swine-scum they serve to you on a silver platter,
you can't help it! And since you know the talk, you know the
buttons that sell-sell-SELLS to them, and you keep pushing those
buttons knowing they can hear you and respond back to you like
evolutionized apes hopping insanely before a 2001: Space Odyssey
black monolith in the shape of a DVD box set for all the Ghostbusters
ever made. You've aped them enough to become one of them, and now
you're wielding the bone fragment over your head to dominate the other
Hollywood execs to your bidding to FUND this piece of absurd desperation.
And when you fling that bone into the sky, I hope it falls back and
smacks you over the head so hard, you'll be conducting seances to bring
John Belushi back from the dead to star in your next film.
Just make a sequel for EVERYTHING Dan.
What? You can't get Tom Hanks to commit to doing one for Dragnet 2?
Is he too high of a price tag for you? No problem!
Just get Will Farrell to step in. I'm sure he could use the work.
And for the Nothing But Trouble sequel, "Nothing but MORE Trouble",
you can rehire Demi Moore for casting since she's not doing anything
relevant at the moment (and from what I can tell, won't be for many
years to come) and be the cause of a Digital Underground reunion!
It'll sell! It's got BANK all over it baby!
Think of it as another golden opportunity to have enough money
to open yet another one of those endless House of Blues joints
where really crappy Blues bands can play, despite the fact that they
couldn't grasp the concept of blues if they were hit over the head with a B.B King guitar pick.
But I do want to thank you Dan. For the first time EVER,
in comparison to that synopsis Harold just shared with the online world,
you have successfully made the entire MATRIX plotline comprehensible
and easy to understand as well as a connect-the-dots coloring book.
You and Harold must have had one heck of a baking session to come up
with this one. No one in their right mind would have bought the premise
for Ghostbusters 3. The ONLY way anyone could accept such an idea
for a movie would be to first take several hits of green, and THEN it'll all
make sense. Maybe if the movie going audience does the same,
it'll all make sense to them too.
Really Dan. You need to stop riding on the thinning fumes of your
past reputation and history to come up with such bizarre material as this.
I went to IMDB to look up stuff on you. And here's a comment on Nothing But Trouble,
which YOU wrote and directed. It should give us all an idea of what the hell we'll be in for,
and just how well you seem to be determined to crash land this franchise to the tarmac:
From IMDB.com comments page-
"I don't want to call it a movie, because I'm not sure as to what I just witnessed. I don't even know how to rate "Nothing But Trouble". It's impossible to judge because I'm just confused. This is a first for me. OK, I'm going to try to write some kind of comment on here. Um, let's see. This movie... no. I would suggest.... no. Ahh! I can't come up with a comment on this film! I don't even know who to recommend it too because it's such a strange movie. I don't know if there can ever be such a rating on a film. If anyone is as baffeled as I am about this movie, please contact me. I'd like to know that I'm not insane or loosing my movie buffiness."
The only thing worse that understanding this movie, would be funding it.
The only thing worse than funding it, would be directing it.
The only thing worse than directing it, would be having come up with the story for it in the first place.
So that should pretty damn well tell you where that puts you Dan.
Dammit Dan. Did you have to take the classes George Lucas gave on
"How to Effectively Rape the Childhood of your Fans"?
Was it really that necessary? Or did you secretly enroll on that Creative Writing course Rick Berman
had been giving for the last 15 years?
I've heard of writers smoking a few hits before writing anything, but DUDE.
You've taken it on a whole new level only William S. Burroughs and Timothy Leary could appreciate.
Congratulations! You've just taken a wonderfully wry and comic satire
with quotable lines and fun characters, and devolved it into this generation's Naked Lunch. Great work man. :ohwell: :romy:
:angry
Ghostbusters in Hell (http://www.cinescape.com/0/editorial.asp?aff_id=0&this_cat=Movies&action=page&type_id=&cat_id=270338&obj_id=51268)
...okay. Shock's over. I got some words for this one. :romy:
:angry
You know what? That's it. I give up.
The soul sucking machine that is Hollywood has won.
This is beyond the sickening black plague that is sequel-itis.
This is sacrilege. This is defamatory. It's asinine.
It's makes crossing the streams nothing more than a fly-fishing mishap.
Dan Aykroyd wrote the script. Yee-haa. What a streak of success he's having now.
Just how many irons in the fire do you have there now Dan?
Let's see- three more sequels for The Blues Brothers, 5 more for
Ghostbusters, with rumors that you first thought of NINE, but decided
to cut back to 6 due to lack of special effects know-how availability?
Wow Dan! You're practically a script writing empire unto itself!
A veritable icon among script-writers! Oh please share with us,
O illustrious maven of sci-fi comedic geniuses - where do you get your muse?
What animals from the NYC sewers have been dug up and
sacrificed at your altar to appease you and make you keep writing?
What potholes, I mean PLOTholes have you refused to fill, O'master?
Will it be THE script according to prophecy, O master Dan?
The one that has the largest plothole in the history of Hollywood?
The one that has a hole so large, the entire screenplay is practically nothing more than a ring?
One ring to rule them all? One ring to hook and reel them?
One ring to take our money, and in a darkened theater steal them?
Yes master Dan! Yes! This is the ONE! The one that will bring a sign
of the end times. Where for those that paid good money to see it
will leave the theaters with weeping and gnashing of teeth!
Dogs and cats living together! Mass hysteria! Genius!
Dan, how do you do it? You made a script that inspired Harold Ramis
to speak in tongues throughout all remaining press junkets and promo
tours for this movie.
You made Bill Murray even THAT much more a respected actor for his
continued refusal to participate in production for this travesty,
while simultaneously lowering the comedic respect for Ben Stiller,
making his past efforts on the screen relegated to classics of comedy
of a bygone era.
So Dan. The royalties from past gems like Nothing But Trouble and Dragnet
must keep you rolling in it, huh? Dare I ask- you got plans for sequels for
them too, don'tcha? Ha! I knew it! Your prolific fire amazes me!
Can't keep a good thing from dying, can you Dan?
On no you can't. What else is gonna pay for your next film productions?
It's a never ending vicious cycle and you're a slave to it.
Why do you keep writing in the hopes of resurrecting the ghosts of past glories?
If only someone had the chutzpah to cross the streams over
YOUR work, so such a concept would be locked away and NEVER HAPPEN.
Why o WHY can you not think of anything coherent?
Was is something you took in the 70's that's finally caught up with
your brain to dementalize your imaginations and warp them to a level
of idiocy that could only be entertaining to the lower depths where
the Hollywood executives dwell?..... Aha! I got it! That's it!
You speak their language you ignorant slut!
You know the vernacular of their misbegotten and misguided plots
used to dumb down the world with, eating so much rotted and fetid
cafeteria swine-scum they serve to you on a silver platter,
you can't help it! And since you know the talk, you know the
buttons that sell-sell-SELLS to them, and you keep pushing those
buttons knowing they can hear you and respond back to you like
evolutionized apes hopping insanely before a 2001: Space Odyssey
black monolith in the shape of a DVD box set for all the Ghostbusters
ever made. You've aped them enough to become one of them, and now
you're wielding the bone fragment over your head to dominate the other
Hollywood execs to your bidding to FUND this piece of absurd desperation.
And when you fling that bone into the sky, I hope it falls back and
smacks you over the head so hard, you'll be conducting seances to bring
John Belushi back from the dead to star in your next film.
Just make a sequel for EVERYTHING Dan.
What? You can't get Tom Hanks to commit to doing one for Dragnet 2?
Is he too high of a price tag for you? No problem!
Just get Will Farrell to step in. I'm sure he could use the work.
And for the Nothing But Trouble sequel, "Nothing but MORE Trouble",
you can rehire Demi Moore for casting since she's not doing anything
relevant at the moment (and from what I can tell, won't be for many
years to come) and be the cause of a Digital Underground reunion!
It'll sell! It's got BANK all over it baby!
Think of it as another golden opportunity to have enough money
to open yet another one of those endless House of Blues joints
where really crappy Blues bands can play, despite the fact that they
couldn't grasp the concept of blues if they were hit over the head with a B.B King guitar pick.
But I do want to thank you Dan. For the first time EVER,
in comparison to that synopsis Harold just shared with the online world,
you have successfully made the entire MATRIX plotline comprehensible
and easy to understand as well as a connect-the-dots coloring book.
You and Harold must have had one heck of a baking session to come up
with this one. No one in their right mind would have bought the premise
for Ghostbusters 3. The ONLY way anyone could accept such an idea
for a movie would be to first take several hits of green, and THEN it'll all
make sense. Maybe if the movie going audience does the same,
it'll all make sense to them too.
Really Dan. You need to stop riding on the thinning fumes of your
past reputation and history to come up with such bizarre material as this.
I went to IMDB to look up stuff on you. And here's a comment on Nothing But Trouble,
which YOU wrote and directed. It should give us all an idea of what the hell we'll be in for,
and just how well you seem to be determined to crash land this franchise to the tarmac:
From IMDB.com comments page-
"I don't want to call it a movie, because I'm not sure as to what I just witnessed. I don't even know how to rate "Nothing But Trouble". It's impossible to judge because I'm just confused. This is a first for me. OK, I'm going to try to write some kind of comment on here. Um, let's see. This movie... no. I would suggest.... no. Ahh! I can't come up with a comment on this film! I don't even know who to recommend it too because it's such a strange movie. I don't know if there can ever be such a rating on a film. If anyone is as baffeled as I am about this movie, please contact me. I'd like to know that I'm not insane or loosing my movie buffiness."
The only thing worse that understanding this movie, would be funding it.
The only thing worse than funding it, would be directing it.
The only thing worse than directing it, would be having come up with the story for it in the first place.
So that should pretty damn well tell you where that puts you Dan.
Dammit Dan. Did you have to take the classes George Lucas gave on
"How to Effectively Rape the Childhood of your Fans"?
Was it really that necessary? Or did you secretly enroll on that Creative Writing course Rick Berman
had been giving for the last 15 years?
I've heard of writers smoking a few hits before writing anything, but DUDE.
You've taken it on a whole new level only William S. Burroughs and Timothy Leary could appreciate.
Congratulations! You've just taken a wonderfully wry and comic satire
with quotable lines and fun characters, and devolved it into this generation's Naked Lunch. Great work man. :ohwell: :romy:
:angry