For the Single Guys

[kah]

Dating tips from the Lounge Ladies


1. Never, ever say you are going to call if you aren't. Say you will try to call, and then do it. It doesn't have to be a marathon phone call. 5 minutes to say you are thinking of her and that you are looking forward to your date is just fine.

2. Never take longer to get ready than she does. High maintenance men are good for only one thing- casual, meaningless, drunken sex.

3. Look her in the eyes when she is talking to you.

keep it going, girls...

btw- Rules 1 and 3 apply to your dates as well. If she doesn't respect you enough to show you that kind of courtesy, then she is not worth your time.

[Jakester]

I like option 2.

[kah]

duh

[Jakester]

But I'm not really high maintenance.

[omicron]

A beer and a blowjob, and Jakester's done for the night. :)

Omi

[kah]

You're also not single. Crazy.

[Queen Mae]

4. Moisturize. Seriously. Would you really want to kiss a woman who had scaly skin? Nope, and we don't want to kiss men with scaly skin. If we wanted to exfoliate, we'd use a loofah, not your face.

5. Keep yourself trimmed.

[Bark]

:rolleyes:

6. When broads tell you what you should be doing, pretend to listen. :D

How about some rules for the ladies from the Lounge Men?

1. Put out.

2. Body hair is bad.

3. Put out some more.

[Metuzalem]

I agree, women ARE SHIT!!! Can you believe that in the last couple of months I've had two "first date" cancellations (from the same girl) and on Saturday night I got stood up on another first date. Take heed girls - YOU ALL JUST MADE MY REVENGE LIST.
Seriously, I've got like zero self confidence now. Like I feel that it's somehow my fault. Bitches the lot of you. :romy:

[omicron]

Ok, I have a question for Kah, Mae and the other assorted female genderers here.

Is it true that if a girl is into you, she will generally make contact with you? I've always heard you can tell if a girl is interested if she touches your hand during conversations, or brushes your arm, or walks up against you, etc etc.

Is this an old wives/socialogist tale or are those things generally indicative of some interest?

Omi

[DaForce]

5. Keep yourself trimmed.


Um....yeah. I could go in a couple of different directions with this one....




:D

[neglet]

Is it true that if a girl is into you, she will generally make contact with you? I've always heard you can tell if a girl is interested if she touches your hand during conversations, or brushes your arm, or walks up against you, etc etc.

I'd say the answer to this is a qualified yes. Especially if a girl is on the shy side, that kind of incidental contact is her way of showing interest. However, some people (and not just girls) are the kind of touchy-feely folks who touch everyone just to be friendly. So observe closely: if the girl in question is making contact with everyone, she's one of those types and isn't necessarily interested in you more than anyone else. If you're the only one receiving little touches, then she's probably interested in you.

[DaForce]

I'd say the answer to this is a qualified yes. Especially if a girl is on the shy side, that kind of incidental contact is her way of showing interest. However, some people (and not just girls) are the kind of touchy-feely folks who touch everyone just to be friendly. So observe closely: if the girl in question is making contact with everyone, she's one of those types and isn't necessarily interested in you more than anyone else. If you're the only one receiving little touches, then she's probably interested in you.


Especially if she grabs your who who, or beanbags.










I don't mean to state the obvious....but sometimes....













:dunno:

[omicron]

Especially if she grabs your who who, or beanbags.

Reminds me of a story I got from a buddy last week at the bar. He was sitting at the bar, watching game 3 of the NBA finals and this cute girl sits down next to him. Remember this is in Dallas, and the bar fills up about 2 hrs before game time so they were squeezed together. She starts flirting, he returns it, and throughout most of the game she proceeds to feel him up, even going so far as to unzip and fondle the big jim and the twins.

IN THE MIDDLE OF A SPORTS BAR. DURING GAME 3 of the NBA FINALS. IN DALLAS.

I wouldn't have believed it, and I was out of town instead of there like I normally would have been, but it was been confirmed by several of the bartenders and other regulars.

Apparently she was out with friends and was pissed off at her husband/boyfriend and wanted to get even. :dunno:

Omi

[sickness]

In my recent experience with the female gender, Omi, they'll be very obvious. Don't look for touches, other subtle signs, etc. They'll be flat-out retarded for you. Their enthusiasm should be obvious. The main thing to work once you've got their attention (or they've gotten yours) is absolute confidence without sending out signals that scream "I'M BEING CONFIDENT, DAMNIT! SLOBBER OVER ME!" If it seems like there's a concious effort, you're fucked. Over the last few months, I've just done my thing and it has paid off in spades.

[omicron]

You know, I've heard the old "do your own thing" "ignore them and they will come to you" etc etc lines before. I have tried that and that explains why I haven't had a girlfriend in 5 yrs. :o

Of course, my own thing usually is sitting at a sports bar drinking beer, sitting at home playing video games drinking beer, or sitting at work surfing the web; none of which are really conducive to meeting and impressing members of the opposite sex. :ohwell:

omi

[Intelligent_Design]

Dating tips from the Lounge Ladies


1. Never, ever say you are going to call if you aren't. Say you will try to call, and then do it. It doesn't have to be a marathon phone call. 5 minutes to say you are thinking of her and that you are looking forward to your date is just fine.

I never say I'm gonna call. I don't even want a number. You want to talk to me, just come over, I never fear a pop-in .Which leads me to the next point



2. Never take longer to get ready than she does. .I'm always ready. Seriously



3. Look her in the eyes when she is talking to you. Why? That creeps me out.

[Queen Mae]

Um....yeah. I could go in a couple of different directions with this one....




:D


And they're all probably the directions I intended for you to go :D

[DaForce]

And they're all probably the directions I intended for you to go :D


Ahh...you always did know how to sweet talk me.

:wink:






:lol:

[sickness]

You know, I've heard the old "do your own thing" "ignore them and they will come to you" etc etc lines before. I have tried that and that explains why I haven't had a girlfriend in 5 yrs. :o

Of course, my own thing usually is sitting at a sports bar drinking beer, sitting at home playing video games drinking beer, or sitting at work surfing the web; none of which are really conducive to meeting and impressing members of the opposite sex. :ohwell:

omi
The trick is that you have to go out and have fun. Go out and have fun with friends. Going out alone and doing 12-ounce curls in a sports bar while you watch the Mavs get their asses handed to them makes you look like a loner and no one wants to be around a loner.

Of course, you could always try online personals.

[Space Tycoon]

I'm the guy who sits at the bar drinking alone. I'm also the guy who until recently used online personals. Neither approach works for me, which is why, like Omicron, I've been single for over four years.

I've had it. I'm done. It's over.

Metuzalem:
I agree, women ARE SHIT!!! Can you believe that in the last couple of months I've had two "first date" cancellations (from the same girl) and on Saturday night I got stood up on another first date. Take heed girls - YOU ALL JUST MADE MY REVENGE LIST.
Seriously, I've got like zero self confidence now. Like I feel that it's somehow my fault. Bitches the lot of you.


I agree completely.




.

[southpaw]

1. Always say "thank you" after a girl gives you a reach-around.

2. No matter how well things seem to be going never ask a lady if you can "get all up in them guts."

3. Never take a girl to a strip club on the first date and ask her which girl there she would consider having a three-way with. (Call me old fashioned, but this is strictly a 2nd date thing.)

4. Backrubs are nice....but not when they are out of the blue from a stranger. Try introducing yourself first at least.

5. Anal sex is never an accident. Don't insult her intelligence by saying you didn't mean to do it, just ask if it's OK....all she can say is no.

6. If you exchange numbers with a lady, do not write down your "measurements" with it. No matter how impressive they may be.

7. After making sweet love to a lady, do not sneak out in the morning and leave a fifty on the dresser. (Unless this was the arrangement that was made.)

8. NEVER show up to a first date drunk unless you are sure she will be drunk when you get there.

9. Never ask a girl if she has children by saying "you got any trophies at home?"

10. Never say, "I bet I kiss better than your Daddy" to a girl EVER.

[TrixieB]

I ahve used some of the online personals and have actually shown up for a couple of dates. One of them was just horrendous. He canceled dinner on Friday night and then called me at noon on Saturday wanting meet me for a drink. So I go and sat in the bar of a restaurant for 2 hours and nursed 1 beer while he told one exaggeration after another, outright lied about his past (I knew a couple of the people that he talked about) and insulted me. I finally left ... thank God I had other plans for the evening... and he called me 5 times the next week and just couldn't figure out why I didn't want to see him again.

The other one was slightly better. We met at a book store and walked around the shopping center for a while. He was fairly intelligent and seemed nice enough, but there was absolutely zero chemistry. Also, we stopped at a coffee shop and he didn't offer to buy me a coffee, so I had to get my own... then he told me that he didn't bring any money except the dollar and a half that he had in his pocket.

I really can pick a winner, huh?

[Bark]

Well, it seems most single women can't (or won't) pick the right guys.

. . .

I said "most" not "all". BTW, what does "no chemistry" mean? "He's nice enough, but I want to f*** someone hotter." That's it, right? :wink:

[kah]

I'd say the answer to this is a qualified yes. Especially if a girl is on the shy side, that kind of incidental contact is her way of showing interest. However, some people (and not just girls) are the kind of touchy-feely folks who touch everyone just to be friendly. So observe closely: if the girl in question is making contact with everyone, she's one of those types and isn't necessarily interested in you more than anyone else. If you're the only one receiving little touches, then she's probably interested in you.

I am one of those girls. The first kind, not the tramps. I can shoot pool, darts, Buck Hunter, and be one of the guys, but if I am interested in a guy, I will usually subconsciously find a way to be touching them most of the time.

[kah]

I'm the guy who sits at the bar drinking alone. I'm also the guy who until recently used online personals. Neither approach works for me, which is why, like Omicron, I've been single for over four years.

I've had it. I'm done. It's over.


.

The guy sitting alone at the bar is never going to get picked up, unless she's hammered, desperate, or out to piss off her boyfriend. If you must hang out at a bar, then go with a friend and have a good time. It's good for women to see men having fun with their friends. It makes them think you would be fun on a date.

Oh, and everything the puppet said, ditto.

[Intelligent_Design]

The guy sitting alone at the bar is never going to get picked up, unless she's hammered, desperate, or out to piss off her boyfriend. .
I mean relly thats 99% of women at bars. Thats why men go there.

[Bark]

The guy sitting alone at the bar is never going to get picked up, unless she's hammered, desperate, or out to piss off her boyfriend. If you must hang out at a bar, then go with a friend and have a good time. It's good for women to see men having fun with their friends. It makes them think you would be fun on a date.

Oh, and everything the puppet said, ditto.

I don't think you understand. ST, doesn't care.

[Space Tycoon]

I don't think you understand. ST, doesn't care.

That is correct buddy. You got it.






And according to the absurd "logic" out there, the longer I don't care, the more irresistable I become.



Or something.




.

[sickness]

As long as you look like you're having fun doing it!

[fastcar]

I remember an episode of the cancelled before it's time show, Cupid, where Trevor (Cupid) takes a bunch of guys to a party and proposes a bet.

It involved using every method you can to fail at getting a response or phone number. In other words, fail on purpose, and you end up succeeding.

It was a humorous outcome that actually might work in some instances.

[Space Tycoon]

As long as you look like you're having fun doing it!

I was being sarcastic.




.

[Bill_the_Pony]

I find all this utterly fascinating.

From an anthropological standpoint, mind you.

:ohwell:

[Space Tycoon]

Glad we could provide you with some amusement.

:smirks:




.

[Bark]

Guys are horny and easy. Women aren't, well most anyway. Gay guys have an advantage in that respect.

[Intelligent_Design]

Guys are horny and easy. Women aren't, well most anyway. Gay guys have an advantage in that respect.


You sir, are the Freud of our time.

[kah]

Never leave a bad tip and never disrespect your waitress. Many, many women out there have worked at least one service job and remember how hard it is to make a living at it, let alone when some jackasses don't believe in tipping. If a waitress/bartender/other tipped personage does a good job, give a 20% tip. It's not extravagant, but it's still better than the "expected" 15%. If the same person does a crappy job, still leave at least 10%, maybe even 15%. Like I said, hard living, especially when waitress wage is $2.33. Never treat your server like they are beneath you, or fail to thank them or look them in the eye. Give them the respect you expect from them. Not only will you get better service, but you will win big points from your lady friend.

[Bark]

You sir, are the Freud of our time.

Thank you. Now, tell me about your parents. :D

[KingVoyeur]

I can't really think of anything to say, so I'll just leave you with a quote from Strangers With Candy.

Jeri: "What's the difference between being married and in love and being horny and in the back of a car?"

:D

[kah]

This is my preference, but I think it is a good rule, so I'm sharing.

Keep PDAs to a minimum.
1. Do you like watching people make out in public places?
2. Does everyone need to know who you are sleeping with or trying to sleep with?
3. If you are dating multiple girls, it's not good for people to look at you and say: "Wasn't he in here making out with a blonde girl last week? I wonder who the redhead is?"

Hold hands, touch arms/legs, just keep your tongues in your mouths and the fondling for the bedroom or at least the car.

[DaForce]

This is my preference, but I think it is a good rule, so I'm sharing.

Keep PDAs to a minimum.
1. Do you like watching people make out in public places?
2. Does everyone need to know who you are sleeping with or trying to sleep with?
3. If you are dating multiple girls, it's not good for people to look at you and say: "Wasn't he in here making out with a blonde girl last week? I wonder who the redhead is?"

Hold hands, touch arms/legs, just keep your tongues in your mouths and the fondling for the bedroom or at least the car.



So a reach around is a definite no-no for you in public?







:D

[Jakester]

1. Do you like watching people make out in public places?
Um...if they're hot, yes.
2. Does everyone need to know who you are sleeping with or trying to sleep with?
I try and share.
3. If you are dating multiple girls, it's not good for people to look at you and say: "Wasn't he in here making out with a blonde girl last week? I wonder who the redhead is?"
I find that AWESOME!

[kah]

~sigh~

[omicron]

2. Does everyone need to know who you are sleeping with or trying to sleep with?

Quite frankly, those are the guys I just ignore. I assume they are exaggerating anyways. If they aren't, well congrats to them. :ohwell:

3. If you are dating multiple girls, it's not good for people to look at you and say: "Wasn't he in here making out with a blonde girl last week? I wonder who the redhead is?"

I don't see why this is a problem with you. Now, if the guy tries and pick you up, and you have seen him in the place with several other girls, you might be wary. But just a random guy, no biggie.

If you see him with a friend of yours, and she thinks it's exclusive, then maybe ya got a problem with him. But just a guy who hangs out at your bar? Hell, makes me envious of him. :)



Omi

[Intelligent_Design]

This is my preference, but I think it is a good rule, so I'm sharing.

Keep PDAs to a minimum.
1. Do you like watching people make out in public places?
2. Does everyone need to know who you are sleeping with or trying to sleep with?
3. If you are dating multiple girls, it's not good for people to look at you and say: "Wasn't he in here making out with a blonde girl last week? I wonder who the redhead is?"



1) Yeah, but only if there are tall bushes for me to hide behind.

2)Hell yeah!! You tell everyone your trying to hook up with and get their reaction. Kinda like a focus group. If you get an overall bad reaction then when you do hook up with the person then you have deny everything when the truth is revealed....Cause the truth will be revealed.

3) Oh, I think its very good when that happens

Hold hands, touch arms/legs, just keep your tongues in your mouths and the fondling for the bedroom or at least the car.
Or public restrooms.

[sickness]

On dating multiple girls, if it isn't exclusive with any one, hell yeah tell 'em! Inspire some jealousy and you inspire a competitive drive like none other on this planet! They'll be doing backflips in bed to make sure they're the one!

[Asonokirk V 2.0]

Reminds me of a story I got from a buddy last week at the bar. He was sitting at the bar, watching game 3 of the NBA finals and this cute girl sits down next to him. Remember this is in Dallas, and the bar fills up about 2 hrs before game time so they were squeezed together. She starts flirting, he returns it, and throughout most of the game she proceeds to feel him up, even going so far as to unzip and fondle the big jim and the twins.

IN THE MIDDLE OF A SPORTS BAR. DURING GAME 3 of the NBA FINALS. IN DALLAS.

I wouldn't have believed it, and I was out of town instead of there like I normally would have been, but it was been confirmed by several of the bartenders and other regulars.

Apparently she was out with friends and was pissed off at her husband/boyfriend and wanted to get even. :dunno:

Omi

I have benefited from "revenge" sex, and it was a win-win situation for me, that's for sure! I met a girl after an AA meeting some years ago, and she just went for me without hesitation. It turned out, and she admitted it after our 3rd date, that she really wasn't that interested in me (that was a "whew" moment, trust me) and had been using me to piss off her boyfriend. I never found out who he was, which was probably good. She was a very very beautiful woman, and those kind usually have big and mean boy friends! I found that out the hard way . . . d'oh . . .

That was at the same time I learned that if a woman is married, I don't care what she looks like, just run away as fast as you can. There are plenty of beautiful women, don't let one of them lead you into becoming referred to as "the victim" in a murder trial . . . :)

[Intelligent_Design]

On dating multiple girls, if it isn't exclusive with any one, hell yeah tell 'em! Inspire some jealousy and you inspire a competitive drive like none other on this planet! They'll be doing backflips in bed to make sure they're the one!


Bingo!!! I'm not the only dude that watches Elimidate here.:)

[Asonokirk V 2.0]

On dating multiple girls, if it isn't exclusive with any one, hell yeah tell 'em! Inspire some jealousy and you inspire a competitive drive like none other on this planet! They'll be doing backflips in bed to make sure they're the one!

Or "inspire" them into conspiring with each other, resulting in something unpleasant, wet, and stinking of hospital corridors?
:)

[Bill_the_Pony]

Which sounds vaguely like a trailer for this movie. (http://www.apple.com/trailers/fox/johntuckermustdie/trailerb/)

[Space Tycoon]

I think I'm going to miss that one.



Unless, of course, there are chestbursting aliens and/or jive-talking robots in it, which is doubtful.





.

[Space Tycoon]

On dating multiple girls, if it isn't exclusive with any one, hell yeah tell 'em! Inspire some jealousy and you inspire a competitive drive like none other on this planet! They'll be doing backflips in bed to make sure they're the one!

Multiple girls... yeah right. I couldn't even get one date this weekend.

Fuck it. I've really had it with women.




.

[tstone]

ST, you stink of desperation, man. That sends them scurrying.

Of course, I'm without date more often than I am, but I'm cool with that. When I do go out, it's with women that I genuinely want to hang out with, nearly always girl geeks.

I don't need plain ol' sex that badly. Masturbation is a guilt free substitute. On the occasions sex is in play, it usually means more than that.

And these stupid games that most men and women make each other play is tedious as hell.

Like the idea that you must be hanging out with your buddies, if you are in a bar, to look like a good subject. Seriously, do most of you ladies really consider that a draw, loud, tipsy guys bwahahaing in a public scene?

Now, personally, I'm not a bar guy. I like wine, but that's not often the best place for it. I also don't like crowds and noise. I'm more likely to be at a coffee shop with a book, and maybe a ready chess board than a bar.

But that's just me.

[Space Tycoon]

I've been doing a lot of thinking, and I've decided to give sex the boot. Total sexual continence. That means no masturbation either. Period.

Starting..... NOW.




.

[Space Tycoon]

I'm going to store up my lifeforce, my chi, my mojo, what the French call a certain... I don't know what.

All that sexual energy will be directed and focused towards my life's work.




.

[omicron]

So in a couple of weeks that large boom we hear coming from up North will be ST spontaneously exploding. :lol:

Omi

[DaForce]

http://www.radgraphics.net/images/main/ArtilleryShell.jpg

[Space Tycoon]

If there's one thing I love, it's a good nuclear explosion.




.

[Bill_the_Pony]

Well, you can always do what I do! :)

[TrixieB]

Hmmm... becoming the master of your domain, huh? Good luck with that. Even I don't want to give that up.

[Senormac]

I think if you put friendliness ahead of sex.....you will have a better chance. And not jerkin is a good idea too. Save up your power till its needed and wanted.....don't waste it. Don't brag...be honest.....never ever ever EVER lie.......

[Jakester]

Then...when a girl looks in your direction, you'll spoo in your pants and they will all point and laugh. Yeah, not jerkin' it is a great idea.

[Senormac]

Jake if you don't have enough control to manage visual stim......then you are really gonna be sorry when the real deal is there. Don't you know about bedroom etiquette? Its just like at a restaurant, a mall or anywhere you are with a woman.....your suppose to LET HER GO FIRST !!!!! :D

[tstone]

When it comes to going first, I personally believe in giving ladies a 3:1 ratio.
Satisfaction guaranteed.

:D



Jake if you don't have enough control to manage visual stim......then you are really gonna be sorry when the real deal is there. Don't you know about bedroom etiquette? Its just like at a restaurant, a mall or anywhere you are with a woman.....your suppose to LET HER GO FIRST !!!!! :D

[tstone]

Agree on the friendliness. Absolutely. But as to not jerkin', no. You don't have a limited set of shots. Jerk all you want, you'll brew more. In fact, it could be like a muscle. You DON'T use it, eventually, it grows weak and flaccid. It wastes away.

:ohwell:



I think if you put friendliness ahead of sex.....you will have a better chance. And not jerkin is a good idea too. Save up your power till its needed and wanted.....don't waste it. Don't brag...be honest.....never ever ever EVER lie.......

[Jakester]

no...just like when you're trying to get one, you're supposed to act like you don't care.

[Space Tycoon]

Well, that didn't last. :o


Damn you, late night Canadian television! :angry



.

[Intelligent_Design]

Well, that didn't last. :o


Damn you, late night Canadian television! :angry



.


Yep those all night Degrassi marathons will do it every time.

[Bark]

I have benefited from "revenge" sex, and it was a win-win situation for me, that's for sure! I met a girl after an AA meeting some years ago, and she just went for me without hesitation. It turned out, and she admitted it after our 3rd date, that she really wasn't that interested in me (that was a "whew" moment, trust me) and had been using me to piss off her boyfriend. I never found out who he was, which was probably good. She was a very very beautiful woman, and those kind usually have big and mean boy friends! I found that out the hard way . . . d'oh . . .

That was at the same time I learned that if a woman is married, I don't care what she looks like, just run away as fast as you can. There are plenty of beautiful women, don't let one of them lead you into becoming referred to as "the victim" in a murder trial . . . :)

. . . or "the accused," like the accused murderer of her husband. Almost happened to Garth in Wayne's World 2.

[Bark]

ST, you don't want to "store up your lifeforce". Your lifeforce is like a bird. It needs to fly, like a Freebird. Then, your lifeforce flows into the universe. It's the difference between a stagnant pond and a flowing brook. :lol:

[Space Tycoon]

It's a moot point. It's not up to me anyway. :o





.

[Bark]

I have a bit of a puzzle myself here. I've been dating this girl for three months. We email almost daily, talk two to three times a week on the phone, and see each other almost weekly. I have feelings for her. I think she has feelings for me, but she's not sure. She has fun with me and enjoys talking to me. Physically, we're at 3rd base, but when the topic of sex came up, she said, "we're not even close." I don't know, man. I think 3rd base is pretty damn close.

Anyway, the issue is ambiguous. She doesn't know if she has feelings for me, but I "add something" to her life, and she "would be hurt if I left."

Apparently, this has happened to her before. She was seeing someone and wasn't sure. He liked her though. When she finally decided she had feelings for this guy, it had been so long, apparently, that he had changed his mind or got impatient. Anyway, he left, and she was hurt.

We had a big talk last night. What I got from her was she was afraid of possibly hurting my feelings if it turned out she didn't have feelings for me afterall, enjoyed spending time with me, definitely wanted a friendship with me at least, and that I am a romantic possibility for the long term.

Bottom line: She still doesn't know what her feelings are.

I'll say this, I would rather walk than fall into the "Friend Zone". It would just be too painful to stick around for that, I think.

Questions to the ladies: How long does it take you to figure out if you have feelings for some guy you've been dating? What's three months compared to that?

[Space Tycoon]

Fuck her. She doesn't know what she wants? Well find someone who does.

She's just a woman. They aren't as irreplaceable as you might think at your age.

Mind you I've got some years on you and a lot of cynicism. Plus I'm all dead inside. So take what I say with a grain of salt.


:smirks:




.

[DaForce]

Guys, try picking up and reading the book called The Game by Neil Strauss.

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0060554738/qid=1152546256/sr=2-1/ref=pd_bbs_b_2_1/104-3185489-1198303?s=books&v=glance&n=283155


It's a fairly interesting look at the world of the 'professional' pickup artist, written by a guy who looks like a skinnier version of Moby. Strauss isn't an a$$hole either. He's the typical nice guy who was interested in how these guys operated, and he learned quite a lot. In fact, he's engaged to the drummer (?) from Courtney Love's band who towers about 4 inches taller than him.

Check it out.


Of course, if that doesn't float your boat, you can always try picking up The Complete A$$hole's Guide to Handling Chicks.

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0312310846/qid=1152546256/sr=2-2/ref=pd_bbs_b_2_2/104-3185489-1198303?s=books&v=glance&n=283155

This was actually written by two of the PUA's (pickup artists) that Strauss mentions in his research for his book. Fairly scary.

[neglet]

We had a big talk last night. What I got from her was she was afraid of possibly hurting my feelings if it turned out she didn't have feelings for me afterall, enjoyed spending time with me, definitely wanted a friendship with me at least, and that I am a romantic possibility for the long term.

Bottom line: She still doesn't know what her feelings are.

I'll say this, I would rather walk than fall into the "Friend Zone". It would just be too painful to stick around for that, I think.

Questions to the ladies: How long does it take you to figure out if you have feelings for some guy you've been dating? What's three months compared to that?

Geez, it's been ages since I've done the dating thing, but I remember three months being around the time I decided I was really falling in love with my husband. (At least, 3 months was about how long it took us to get to the dirty deed. :smirk:) We moved in together after another 15 months, and got married a year after that.

However, I hadn't ever been burned in a romantic relationship before. If I had gotten involved with a guy really quickly and been dumped, or he turned out to be a jerk, maybe I'd have trouble trusting my own judgment. After three months I might really like a guy, but I might still hold back for fear of being hurt again.

The fact is, you're taking a risk any time you get involved with someone. Maybe they'll turn out to be wrong for you and waste your time. Maybe they'll sleep with your best friend and break your heart. Maybe they'll be your soulmate but will get run over by a bus or die of some awful disease the year after your wedding. You can't know until it happens.

So, do you shut yourself away because "maybe" you'll get hurt? Or do you take a risk, enjoy the journey while you're on it, and leave the pain to the future--if that pain ever comes around, of course. Only you can decide whether the potential return is worth the risk of potential hurt.

I will say: at least she's being honest with you. She doesn't sound like she's playing with you, or testing you (at least not consciously, who knows about her subconscious), and she's definitely not shutting you out. If you really like this girl, she's probably worth a little more patience.

[Ronnie]

Some of this shit is hilarious!!! Back to the bar scene thing again... I don't think there's anything wrong with a guy going out to a bar by himself if he is there to just have a good time. If he meets a girl great, if not, that's great too. I did it for a while... so much in fact they eventually gave me a job. I will reiterate what kah (I think it was kah) said as well. Be nice to your bartenders and waitresses. In the five years I worked in bars, I can't tell you the number of females who approached me to ask about certain guys. The good ones would get glowing reviews and the *******s would be called out. I even asked one of our bartenders about my current wife 5 or so years ago. As a door guy/bouncer, I tended to pay more attention to the guys as they were the ones likely to cause trouble so I asked one of the bartenders that I knew well how did she act/behave while she was in the bar. She got the Carrie seal of approval and that was enough for me...

[Senormac]

Maybe too much masterbating causes ......erectile disfunction later in life :D :D :D

[Space Tycoon]

Fortunately, there are endless varieties of chemical and herbal solutions on the for just that very problem.

Or so a quick scan of my email inbox would lead me to believe.... :o





.

[kah]

Situations like you are in Bark, usually lead to good friendships if it doesn't work out. I don't think she is playing with you. I think she probably thinks you are a great guy and have all those qualities she thinks she wants (ok, most of them:wink: ), but maybe that spark is missing? Chalk it up to pheromones(sp?). Either you have chemistry or you don't. Fortunately, that's not the end of the road, since chemistry is not just in how you smell, but in getting to know one another and building other bonds. Maybe she just needs to get acquainted with your cowbell?

Give her time. She's playing it safe and being honest with you at the same time. That's pretty fuckin' awesome if you ask me.

[Bark]

Talked again. She does have feelings for me, but sometimes feels the chemistry clicks on and off. It could be from my reaction to her admittedly mixed signals. She got burned on another time when she did move fast, and the guy disappeared.

Right now, we're still on. I'm cautiously optimistic.

[bigfras81]

The answer to all your problems - http://www.shvoong.com/books/253409-game/

[Bark]

Even if my problem is a big douche posting crap? :smirks:

[rappites]

Sounds like to me she has more than you in her life. . . .When I meet my husband I knew right away that we were going to spend the rest of our lives together. Chemistry. . .that tingle feeling that make the hairs on your arms stand up. After seven years he still does it to me. . .




I have a bit of a puzzle myself here. I've been dating this girl for three months. We email almost daily, talk two to three times a week on the phone, and see each other almost weekly. I have feelings for her. I think she has feelings for me, but she's not sure. She has fun with me and enjoys talking to me. Physically, we're at 3rd base, but when the topic of sex came up, she said, "we're not even close." I don't know, man. I think 3rd base is pretty damn close.

Anyway, the issue is ambiguous. She doesn't know if she has feelings for me, but I "add something" to her life, and she "would be hurt if I left."

Apparently, this has happened to her before. She was seeing someone and wasn't sure. He liked her though. When she finally decided she had feelings for this guy, it had been so long, apparently, that he had changed his mind or got impatient. Anyway, he left, and she was hurt.

We had a big talk last night. What I got from her was she was afraid of possibly hurting my feelings if it turned out she didn't have feelings for me afterall, enjoyed spending time with me, definitely wanted a friendship with me at least, and that I am a romantic possibility for the long term.

Bottom line: She still doesn't know what her feelings are.

I'll say this, I would rather walk than fall into the "Friend Zone". It would just be too painful to stick around for that, I think.

Questions to the ladies: How long does it take you to figure out if you have feelings for some guy you've been dating? What's three months compared to that?

[Jakester]

Woof-man, it's time to fish or cut bait. 3 months and she's not sure where the relationship is?!

[Bark]

You know how women say they hate guys that are *******s? Well, did it ever occur to them that they make us *******s through their insane logic and actions? Just a thought. :D

[Jakester]

No...I'm just like that normally.

[Bark]

Well, I wasn't normally, but I'm getting there. The crazy thing is that I believe we're both good people making an honest effort. Generally speaking, even with that going in someone's favor, relationships are work.

I am pondering if there is a polite way to ask for a hand job though. :D

[sickness]

Just start initiating some hanky panky and, if she obliges, put her hand there. She's smart enough to figure it out.

[Jakester]

Listen to Sicks. He's smooth like that. Or, you could be like me and say, "You know, I'd really love a blowjob." If she freaks out, you then say, "okay, how about a handjob?" Yeah...that's the ticket.

[rappites]

When we were living in Yuma, AZ last year and my husband heard that in Mexico you could get a blowjob, handjob and something put up your butt for $20. So, go to Mexico and you can get it all handled for $20 and you dont have to worry about offending or getting a girl drunk to get you off. I hear that they have great things at sex shops that feels like someone is giving it to you. That is all that matters right. The feeling that someone is giving you the pleasure.

[Bark]

Wrong. What's important is spending time with someone I care about. Then, it's to relieve the pressure and discomfort that has built up in my loins as a result of spending time with someone I care about; the more fun the relief is, the better. :D

(My 400th post, ladies and gentlemen.)

[rappites]

But, it sounds like to me you all arent looking for someone you care about. You are just looking for a quickie.

All men want is food, sex and to be left alone to do as they please.

[Al-Dog]

All men want is food, sex and to be left alone to do as they please.

See, men aren't that hard to understand.

Now lets figure out what women want.

[Jakester]

Someone to hang on their every word, enjoy shopping for shoes with them and to say "yes, dear," and actually mean it.
In short, women want gay boyfriends.

[Bark]

I'm looking for a long sexual encounter with someone I care about. Don't play the, "men are jerks who only want sex," card. I want something deep and meaningful ALONG WITH sex. The point of view that me wanting some physical affection makes me an ******* is erroneous. That doesn't make me an *******. The fact that I hate most people is what makes me an *******.

BTW, just because some guy isn't at all interested in sex doesn't make him sensitive. It just makes him a weirdo.

Here's an experiment: Go to your husband and offer a sexual encounter where you'll give him heights of pleasure he's only dreamed of. After you do, read on . . .

. . . Did he turn you down? I didn't think he would. :smirks:

[rappites]

I think if I went to my husband right now for sex. . .I think he would turn me down.

I was not only referring to you. . .But, that is a ego complex that men have. . .

Anyway. . good luck on your quest in finding a porn star.

[Jakester]

Rapps, if you were to just go pull out his weiner and start with the bj, I don't think you'd be turned down. If you were, I'm available.

Admittedly, I'm 36...I've discovered I have a comfy chair and the joys of napping. The hormones aren't raging like they once were.

[rappites]

[QUOTE=Jakester]Rapps, if you were to just go pull out his weiner and start with the bj, I don't think you'd be turned down. If you were, I'm available.

If I did that. . .I would really not get anything. . .because he got his.

I will be 36 in a few months. . .and thanks for the offer. . .if feel ya on the slowing down part. .

[Bark]

I think if I went to my husband right now for sex. . .I think he would turn me down.

I was not only referring to you. . .But, that is a ego complex that men have. . .

Anyway. . good luck on your quest in finding a porn star.

Alright everybody, between the two of us here, one is cheeky and fun, asking a serious relationship type question in the guise of good fun, as is common here. The other is bitter and paints people in broad cliches with no apparent sense of humor. Now who's who? :smirks:

(Now I realize the "bitter and paints people in broad cliches" might throw you off, that's why I included the sense of humor bit. :D )

[tstone]

Not me. I want a girl geek who appreciates my geekitude. One who can talk my big thoughts and ideas and has plenty of her own she wants to talk about.

The sex, too, but as a way of adding to intimacy. Not interested in just getting my rocks off.

Got that covered.



But, it sounds like to me you all arent looking for someone you care about. You are just looking for a quickie.

All men want is food, sex and to be left alone to do as they please.

[Al-Dog]

I want a girl geek who appreciates my geekitude. One who can talk my big thoughts and ideas and has plenty of her own she wants to talk about.

Good luck. Decent looking geek-girls are in high demand.

[tstone]

Ah yes, but the same with said geek guys.

:D

Actually, I've been lucky to meet a few. If you are a geek guy who CAN mix socially, has a certain amount of charm, good looks and self maintenance (ie you work out), your odds go up considerably.

If you are a schlup who doesn't shower, work out and have the personality of an anti social hermit crab, you ain't landing any women, geek or non.

[Bark]

Watch out tstone. Showing multiple dimensions to your personality just may invalidate gross generalizations some people here use to navigate the ocean of society. :D

[tstone]

Gotta break your programming, yo.

:D

[Al-Dog]

Ah yes, but the same with said geek guys.

:D

Actually, I've been lucky to meet a few. If you are a geek guy who CAN mix socially, has a certain amount of charm, good looks and self maintenance (ie you work out), your odds go up considerably.

If you are a schlup who doesn't shower, work out and have the personality of an anti social hermit crab, you ain't landing any women, geek or non.

All kidding aside, I’m a married guy, so this thread isn’t really directed towards me, but reading some of the previous posts, I find it amazing that there are guys who are interested in dating, that can for years without finding someone willing to date them.

A couple of years ago, my wife and I had separated for about half a year. During that period, I didn’t have any problems dating. Now, I’m not saying everyone is a bronze Adonis like me,:wink: but is it really that difficult?

Maybe I’m wrong, but I would think that almost everyone has something about them those members of the opposite sex would find attractive. If not looks, then charm or intelligence, money always sexy. Even a good line of BS can work (short time).

Also, there is nothing wrong with lowering your standards. If you look like Jabba the hut, perhaps the hard body lawyer isn’t for you. Check out the chubby girl working at Blockbuster, you might be pleasantly surprised.

[sickness]

Ah yes, but the same with said geek guys.

:D

Actually, I've been lucky to meet a few. If you are a geek guy who CAN mix socially, has a certain amount of charm, good looks and self maintenance (ie you work out), your odds go up considerably.

If you are a schlup who doesn't shower, work out and have the personality of an anti social hermit crab, you ain't landing any women, geek or non.
I hear ya, T. I'm still a geek / dork at heart but over the last several years I've taken to the idea of broadening my horizons and improving my physical well-being. Once I did that, even though it didn't bring my any confidence, people started to notice and that's what did. I now actually have women tell me I'm hot/attractive/whatever several times a week and sometimes they're complete strangers. I think I've done a lot of hard work to improve my physical appearance but I wouldn't describe myself as hot, especially in the face, but they would and who am I to argue? I probably get hit on 20 or so times a month and literally turn down all but one and sometimes all of them.

Geeks can be very sexy if they show themselves to be well-rounded people. All the adonises out there that the geeks envy... well, they've got a little geek deep down inside, too, they've just made a point of having other redeeming qualities as well. It's a numbers game. It's like buying a car. You don't just go buy the least expensive car because it's cheap. Hell, you probably won't buy the least expensive car because it doesn't meet your requirements or it's not reliable enough in the long term, etc.

[rappites]

Geeks have an advantage over non-geek guys is that they are not into themselves (ego/vain) so they let their women shine and are more attentive.

Geeks are HOT. . .

[tstone]

This is true. Lots of geek guys tend to appreciate women more and treat them better.

The himbos don't think they have to. Further, the women who hook up with them often let them perpetuate this feeling.

[Metuzalem]

Someone to hang on their every word, enjoy shopping for shoes with them and to say "yes, dear," and actually mean it.
In short, women want gay boyfriends.

Then why am I single?

Geeks are HOT. . .

Then why is ST single?

[TrixieB]

Then why is ST single?

Because there's geek and then there's ST!! :wink::D:wink::D












Sorry, Spacey... I just HAD to do it!:hugs:

[Al-Dog]

All hail the hottest geek chick ever.

http://www.ew.com/ew/report/0,6115,1213683_1%7C17673%7C%7C0_0_,00.html

I'd come out of geek, semi-retirement if I thought I had half a chance.

[Outsydr]

What... no PIX in your article??? Bro...


http://www.comicon.com/thebeat/dawson107.jpg

[DaForce]

Okay, that article makes her seem waaaay more interesting than she is in reality. At Comic Con, I actually had to leave the room for fear of falling asleep.

[kah]

I think ST's hot, but apparently my opinion doesn't count. :dunno:

I would never, ever date a guy that was prettier than me.
1. I don't want to share the bathroom with a guy who takes longer to get ready than I do.
2. He's not paying attention to me if he's busy looking in the mirror.
3. He'll move on to a better looking girl the second the opportunity arises.
4. I don't want to listen to him whine when he starts wrinkling and greying, and suddenly realizes he's 40 and has never had a meaninful relationship.

[TrixieB]

Kah, I agree with you about ST (hence the smileys and the apology)... especially in that pic with the beard.

Where has Spacey been lately, anyway?

[Bark]

Well, I think it's over. It feels over. After our deep talk and time to think, things got worse when we finally got back together. Oh well. :dunno:

1. I don't want to share the bathroom with a guy who takes longer to get ready than I do.

What if it takes him a while to shave his back, or do you prefer a grizzly type of guy? :lol:

[kah]

I would prefer a guy with a hairy back to a guy with a shaved hairy back.

Why?

1. Whiskers are not nice on the skin.
2. Some day he would ask me to shave his back. I shaved my own legs when I was 9 months pregnant, I will not shave some guy's back simply because his arms don't bend that way.
3. As long as it doesn't look like a sweater, body hair is manly.

[Bark]

1. Whiskers are not nice on the skin.
True, but is unsightly body hair really better?
2. Some day he would ask me to shave his back. I shaved my own legs when I was 9 months pregnant, I will not shave some guy's back simply because his arms don't bend that way.
Don't be so certain. (http://www.razorba.com/) :)
3. As long as it doesn't look like a sweater, body hair is manly.
And if it does look like a sweater? :eek:

[tstone]

Suck. Sorry to hear that.

:(



Well, I think it's over. It feels over. After our deep talk and time to think, things got worse when we finally got back together. Oh well. :dunno:



What if it takes him a while to shave his back, or do you prefer a grizzly type of guy? :lol:

[kah]

And if it does look like a sweater? :eek:

Trust me. There are girls out there that dig that.

[Bark]

Suck. Sorry to hear that.

:(

Muchas gracias, mi amigo, but that's life. Learn from it and move on.

It wasn't going to work anyway. She never heard of "Stargate". :D

[Metuzalem]

Awwwwwwww, well I'm glad that ST is getting some love on this board now. But you know, I did post that rant about me too............. :(

[tstone]

I keep saying it, dude. Lady geeks, accept no substitutes. My very first girlfriend was so much a teacher on the ways of love. It didn't end well (it happened during my first enlistment in the 80s), but it did teach me alot, including the value of common ground.

I want to sit down on a SciFi Friday with a beautiful belle and have her be just as excited as I am. And talk about the episodes afterwards.

That is heaven, my friend.



Muchas gracias, mi amigo, but that's life. Learn from it and move on.

It wasn't going to work anyway. She never heard of "Stargate". :D

[Space Tycoon]

I want Salma Hayek to return my many phone calls, pages, e-mails, letters, and just general stalking that prove I am the only one for her.*

Do I ask so much? Really...











* Strictly a fanciful jest, of course. I have done no such thing and will not admit to as much in a court of law.

[Space Tycoon]

Kah, I agree with you about ST (hence the smileys and the apology)... especially in that pic with the beard.

Where has Spacey been lately, anyway?

I just moved in to a new place. Small but good enough for me to continue my life's work in relative peace.

I currently have no computer. This is agonizing. I will probably buy one in the coming weeks. In the meantime my posts will be sporadic, yet still chock full of that spacey goodness you've all come to expect.

[TrixieB]

Spacey, baby!!!

We have missed you soooooooo much!! Please get a computer soon so that we can harass you full time.

[Space Tycoon]

I could get a cheap one now if I wanted. But I'd rather save up so I can get a quality platform.

I'm sorry I missed the Lance Bass thread. The fun, the frivolity...

[Space Tycoon]

Oh, and I missed youse guys too.


:hugs:

[kah]

the bashing, the ignoring...

Don't wait too long to get a computer. Trix and I need a cute single man to flirt with.:D

[TrixieB]

Gee, Kah.... do you think he can handle both of us together?

[kah]

No- but it'd be fun to watch him try. :smirks:

[TrixieB]

Well, I'm always up for some fun.

[DaForce]

the bashing, the ignoring...

Don't wait too long to get a computer. Trix and I need a cute single man to flirt with.:D


*ahem*


He's not the only fish in the sea..



.

[TrixieB]

Forcey, honey... we didn't mean to leave you out.

I don't know about Kah, but I am an equal oppurtunity flirt.

[Metuzalem]

See? This is the shit I was talking about, no love for the B-Train. Except for Jakester of course, but his love is dirty and wrong. Plus I think secretley he only wants to ride the B-Train for the pure noteriety of it. Just to sell it as a Kiss and Tell story.

[Bark]

I could get a cheap one now if I wanted. But I'd rather save up so I can get a quality platform.

I'm sorry I missed the Lance Bass thread. The fun, the frivolity...

Check out eMachine's computers. They're relatively cheap, but pack reasonable punch. I bought a T3120, but the T3506, T6528, and T6532 are worth a look, unless you want to build your own monster system, that is. However for something out-of-the-box, it's a good way to go. Double check to see if the monitor's included. :D

[kah]

Spacey needs more attention since he's given up on women. We can't let him go without a fight. :smirk: Don't worry, though, after Spacey and Jake there's still got enough kah to go around. :D

[rappites]

Question you have to ask your self Force. . .Do you want sloppy seconds after Jakester?

[DaForce]

Question you have to ask your self Force. . .Do you want sloppy seconds after Jakester?


Not without first being encased in two Level A hazard suits, sterilizing the area to be used with 15 gallons of gasoline and a fire chaser, and then maybe, maybe I might consider it.



.

[Bark]

Does this make any sense to you guys:

I see myself as being pretty in touch with my feelings, so much that I second guess them.

[DaForce]

That falls under the same line as "It isn't you, it's me". :lol:




.

[Bark]

Funny because I broke things off, not her.

If you're in touch with your feelings, wouldn't that mean you DON'T second guess them? :confused:

[kah]

This just reminds me of how much I hate liars. I would take an honest jerk over a compassionate liar anyday.

[southpaw]

Well, if you are ever in the market for a compassionate jerk sweetie I'm the sockpuppet for you. [WINK]

[kah]

I already knew that. :wink:

[neglet]

Does this make any sense to you guys: "I see myself as being pretty in touch with my feelings, so much that I second guess them."

Translation: "I'm so self-absorbed that I obsess over my own feelings to the point of overanalysis. No wonder I can't remember how I actually feel about anything, or spare a moment to care about what you might actually be feeling."

Sounds like too much high-maintenance drama, and you were wise not to get entangled further in it.

[Bark]

Your post makes me feel good. Thanks! :D

Thanks for the interpretation too. That sentence was really confounding to me.

[Bark]

Translation: "I'm so self-absorbed that I obsess over my own feelings to the point of overanalysis. No wonder I can't remember how I actually feel about anything, or spare a moment to care about what you might actually be feeling."

Sounds like too much high-maintenance drama, and you were wise not to get entangled further in it.

BTW neglet, how the hell did you get this? That's spot-on with what my problems with the relationship were. It's spooky you got that from this one sentence of her's. You have shocked me with your insight on the human condition through grammar alone, and I'm not easily shocked!

[kah]

Hello- Bark? We're women. We know all their tricks. Some of us may even have used a few of them. Or we know people who have. We actually talk to each other about things, so we know when to steer our guy friends away from a tramp or emotional vampire, because we can see them coming a mile away.

[Bark]

Men much simpler. Fire cook food. Women look pretty. Car go fast.

[neglet]

BTW neglet, how the hell did you get this? That's spot-on with what my problems with the relationship were. It's spooky you got that from this one sentence of hers. You have shocked me with your insight on the human condition through grammar alone, and I'm not easily shocked!

Take your pick:

1. I am freakishly smart.
2. I am mature and wise (ie, 40--but I look younger!).
3. I have professional experience in parsing language.
4. All of the above. :D

Actually, I remember being a self-absorbed adolescent, as well as your previous comments about the problems you were having with this girl, so it wasn't to hard to extrapolate that sentence's true meaning.

[Bark]

I'll choose #4. :D