Don't F*ck With Mr. Clause

[southpaw]

So I had just finished writing my annual threating letter to Santa explaining to him all the horrors that would befall him if he didn't meet my demands this year....it has been 21 straight years that fat f*ck has left everyones loveable sockpuppet jacksh!t under the tree. The restraining order he placed against me expired over the summer, so I figured I would make this years letter extra evil.....killing, cooking, and eating rudolph while making him and Mrs. Clause watch....sodomizing him with a giant candy cane.....and that is just some of the light stuff that I had written. I finished the letter and placed it in the mailbox at the post office, I was pretty proud of my letter and figured this year I would finally get my message across to Saint Nick. I felt pretty good about myself, until on my way home I passed by the local church.....the ominous holiday message on their sign left my blood running cold......



http://img219.imageshack.us/img219/179/santaattacksqu6.jpg



Ummm.....did anyone else know about this??? I guess now I gotta go out and buy a gun.....the irony is...I asked Santa for a gun this year. DAMN IT baby Jesus.....why didn't you put that warning up on your magic sign YESTERDAY. I told him in my letter that I knew where he lived...and that I could get into his house! My letters have been bad before...but I'm sure this years letter put me at the top of the list. If I don't make it through Christmas this year.....I just want you to know that I love you all....not exactly "I wanna go all the way with you" I love you all....but definitely "under the bra, up the skirt" I love you all.



Merry Christmas everyone......and be safe out there.

[Lavoruis]

Have you been sniffing airplane glue again?

[southpaw]

Have you been sniffing airplane glue again?



Well....it is Sunday night isn't it?

[fastcar]

Innocent Spelling Error or Religious Commentary? Hmmmmm.

[omicron]

I think I'd mark it up to some wise-ass messing with the sign. :)

[spammityspam]

More like it's the ever-entertaining church sign generator (http://www.churchsigngenerator.com/).

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b298/spamisnumba1/churchsign.jpg

[rappites]

Hey that is cool.

[southpaw]

More like it's the ever-entertaining church sign generator (http://www.churchsigngenerator.com/).

http://i21.photobucket.com/albums/b298/spamisnumba1/churchsign.jpg



No ma'am......I took the pic myself.

[kah]

What do you mean, you don't want to go all the way? All this time you've been leading me on with no intention to put out? I don't think we can be friends anymore.

[neglet]

Well, everyone knows you can't combine socks with stilettos. I think your chance for southie lovin' was tragically doomed from the start.

[kah]

http://www.websmileys.com/sm/sad/1381.gif

[southpaw]

What do you mean, you don't want to go all the way? All this time you've been leading me on with no intention to put out? I don't think we can be friends anymore.




You my dear are the exception....not the rule.:wink:

[kah]

Good. :D I was worried for a minute there.