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View Full Version : Siddown and shut up, you fat f**k!


DaForce
04-19-2006, 08:26 AM
Gawd how I love the irony of our government at present...



For "ugly Americans" overseas, it's time to slow down, speak softly and stop bragging

They're loud, their clothes are all wrong and, as the late American novelist Patricia Highsmith once noted of her countrywomen in particular, they always seem to take up too much space. They're among the United States' most visible - and audible - exports and, as obesity keeps increasing among Americans, some of its biggest ones, too. They're the legendary "ugly American" travelers whom Europeans and other foreigners put up with but often find to be clueless when it comes to good taste in dress and decorum.

Now such "loud-mouthed Americans abroad are being warned to quiet down - by their own government. They are being urged to listen to locals and avoid arguments in a bid to repair America's battered international reputation." Behind the new campaign to get American travelers heading to other countries to be more sensitive and to leave the Homer Simpson behavior at home is Business for Diplomatic Action (http://www.businessfordiplomaticaction.org/who/index.html), a U.S.-based, non-profit group whose Web site declares: "Anti-Americanism is bad for business." The organization is supported by major U.S. corporations. BDA's assumption: If Americans overseas would just change their behavior, "anti-Americanism" in other countries would diminish, as foreigners would have less to resent, to snicker at, or even to hate about U.S. visitors.

BDA has created a passport-size World Citizens Guide to teach Americans bound for other countries how to behave like, well, citizens of the world - instead of like self-absorbed strays from the suburbs. BDA is teaming up with the U.S. State Department to distribute its guide to American young people heading abroad. "There are also plans to give it away with every new U.S. passport." (Daily Record (http://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/tm_objectid=16955268&method=full&siteid=66633&headline=yankees--oodles-of-handy-tips--name_page.html), U.K.)

"The reputation of the 'Ugly American' abroad is not...just some cruel stereotype, but - according to the American government itself - worryingly accurate," Britain's Telegraph (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2006/04/16/wtour16.xml) notes. "Loud and brash, in gawdy garb and baseball caps, more than three million of them flock to our shores every year. Shuffling between tourist sites or preparing to negotiate a business deal, they bemoan the failings of the world outside the United States." Many citizens of other countries find such self-centeredness and boasting offensive.

Among the pointers for Americans traveling abroad offered in Business for Diplomatic Action's World Citizens Guide:

» "Listen at least as much as you talk. (By all means, talk about America and your life in our country. But also ask people you're visiting about themselves and their way of life.)"

» "Save the lectures for your kids." The guide adds, without irony (and without any hint of self-examination): "Justified or not, the U.S. is seen as imposing its will on the world."

» Also, in a bit of wise counsel that might serve as well at home as it might abroad, the guidebook reminds American travelers: "Your religion is your religion and not necessarily theirs. (Religion is usually considered deeply personal, not a subject (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2006/04/16/wtour16.xml) for public discussions.)"

Keith Reinhard, an advertising executive who heads BDA, said: "Surveys consistently show that Americans are viewed as arrogant, insensitive, over-materialistic and ignorant about local values. That...is the image of the Ugly American abroad, and we want to change it (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2006/04/16/wtour16.xml)."

India's Daily News & Analysis (http://www.dnaindia.com/report.asp?NewsID=1023887) was among the foreign media outlets that have reported the release of the World Citizens Guide, as did the Wall Street Journal in the U.S. DNA cited the conservative, U.S. paper's report and noted that, whatever the new guidebook's good intentions might be, "the financial daily had [had] the last word" when it observed: "Of course, major U.S. foreign-policy decisions and events like the Iraq war far outweigh manners when it comes to shaping the perception of Americans overseas."


Fuck, I'm thinking of grabbing a couple of cases of these books and just handing them out to all the dumbasses that yell into their cellphones, and just generally act like asses in public to begin with. On second thought, instead of handing them out, maybe I'll bean the idiots in the head with the book.



Oh, here's the link:

http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/blogs/sfgate/detail?blogid=15&entry_id=4459

KingVoyeur
04-19-2006, 08:30 AM
Hypocrisy anyone? So.....do government bureaus not communicate at all? Cause it seems like a lot of problems could've been solved if a few people in the White House had just read this helpful little pamplet.

DaForce
04-19-2006, 08:38 AM
Here's a link to the guide itself...

http://www.worldcitizenguide.com/index2.html

omicron
04-19-2006, 08:39 AM
ya know, I can summarize that whole guide:

DON'T BE AN A$$HOLE.


hmm did someone turn back on the censors. :(

kah
04-19-2006, 08:47 AM
Thank you!!! It's about fucking time! It's one thing to use your freedom of speech. It's another to twist that to mean it's ok for you to be rude and shove your opinions down other people's throats. I have friends I won't go out in public with for these same reasons. They are the ones who flag down servers from across the restaurant, talk shit about people in hearing distance, smoke next to other people's kids, tip like a homeless person (had tham as customers in one restaurant), stand in the middle of an aisle blocking others' passage, and generally act as if they are the only person worth a shit in the room. I even hate going out to eat with the bf's father because he won't look the server in the eyes, or say thankyou, and demands refills, all the while bitching about how long everything is taking. I can only imagine how people in other countries react to this behavior from tourists. Shameful. I need a good 6 dozen copies.

jayce78
04-19-2006, 09:07 AM
Tom Cruise once again barges in and responds:


''Fat people need to shut up & take a good multi-vitamin''.

http://img526.imageshack.us/img526/6338/sd0rs.png (http://imageshack.us)

''My wife never better get fat or I'm dumpin her ass!'' ''Ohh gosh did I say ass . . I'm glad my scientology best friend isn't here''.


'Hhhahahahahaaaaaaaa!''

Asonokirk V 2.0
04-19-2006, 09:23 AM
Does anyone here believe that the people most in need of lessons in behavior are actually going to read this guide? Buttholes are buttholes, and they aren't going to behave any differently than they always have no matter what anyone trys to tell them, most likely.

A better solution would be to not allow idiots to leave the country. Although . . . maybe it would work better if we let them leave, and then don't let them back in!

Or . . .
Travel agent: "Yes, we can book you for 6 days and 6 nights into that hotel in Paris, but there is one requirement before we can get you in there."

Obnoxious traveler: "Well, what the fuck is it, jerk?"

Travel agent: "Your trip has to be routed through Baghdad."

kah
04-19-2006, 09:57 AM
Does anyone here believe that the people most in need of lessons in behavior are actually going to read this guide? Buttholes are buttholes, and they aren't going to behave any differently than they always have no matter what anyone trys to tell them, most likely.

A better solution would be to not allow idiots to leave the country. Although . . . maybe it would work better if we let them leave, and then don't let them back in!

Or . . .
Travel agent: "Yes, we can book you for 6 days and 6 nights into that hotel in Paris, but there is one requirement before we can get you in there."

Obnoxious traveler: "Well, what the fuck is it, jerk?"

Travel agent: "Your trip has to be routed through Baghdad."

You're right. The biggest problem *******s are not going to read it, or care if they actually do. But maybe, just maybe, some of the lesser offenders will take heart. Just a little more politeness and manners would do our country a lot of good. When I started dating my bf, I knew he was the one right away. Want to know how? He opened doors for me. He coughed behind his hand. He put his napkin on his lap when we went out to eat. He chewed with his mouth SHUT. Simple manners. If only men knew how sexy they could be, more would put them into use.

Cncrman
04-19-2006, 10:42 AM
If only men knew how sexy they could be, more would put them into use.

Well heck, why am I even hitting the gym again?

"Hey baby, You wanna see my manners?"

kah
04-19-2006, 12:11 PM
Well heck, why am I even hitting the gym again?

"Hey baby, You wanna see my manners?"

I'm telling you, it's a big turn on. And women don't need a man to be ripped. Not fat would be fine. You guys just need to realize it's not all about looks. Women let you think that because you guys act like it is.

Cncrman
04-19-2006, 12:29 PM
Oh good, then I am right where I want to be. :)

MPG
04-19-2006, 12:32 PM
"The reputation of the 'Ugly American' abroad is not...just some cruel stereotype, but - according to the American government itself - worryingly accurate," Britain's Telegraph notes. "Loud and brash, in gawdy garb and baseball caps, more than three million of them flock to our shores every year. Shuffling between tourist sites or preparing to negotiate a business deal, they bemoan the failings of the world outside the United States." Many citizens of other countries find such self-centeredness and boasting offensive.
While I'm the first to say that a lot of what is being said about the stereotypical American tourist is actually astonishingly correct in many cases, I think tourists from other countries are just as bad. I guess one can just make the general statement "Tourists suck". Ok, not all of them, but I think it's true for the vast majority. Many people do visit other countries to see, understand and appreciate other cultures, to try to blend in to some extent and treat the "natives" with courtesy and respect in the process. Most people, however, seem to have an aversion against anything that is different, and that goes for people from any country. It is just more noticeable when Americans behave like idiots, because it matches the stereotype.

Intelligent_Design
04-19-2006, 01:00 PM
I'm telling you, it's a big turn on. And women don't need a man to be ripped. Not fat would be fine. You guys just need to realize it's not all about looks. Women let you think that because you guys act like it is.

Wow I didn't think Low maintenance Chicks existed anymore.For Most chicks I know looks are a big thing.:ohwell:

Bill_the_Pony
04-19-2006, 01:17 PM
Kah, I love your checklist of farkwads on the first page. My outlook on society is pretty bleak, and I think most people these days are utter cretins.

I pretty much despise going out these days as well. I had to drive the other Friday night to get some tax papers done, and even in the rain, the number of cretins on the freeway was staggering. I'm talking about the pushy, high-beam blinking tailgaters (I drive fast enough, mind you) that jeopardise everyone else.....on the freeway AND the surface streets.

All I can do is put my own best foot forward, and it works. The only people it doesn't work with? Ghetto slob trash that is beneath wasting time on to begin with.

As far as vacations, the Fugly American proliferates in American vacation areas, too. Loud, rude fat-asses wearing plaid, fanny-packs, stupid t-shirts....I saw some old hag at the Grand Canyon yelling at some French tourists passing by, "IN ENGLISH!" :rolleyes:

Then there are the idiot weekly rentals along the beach.

It's no wonder the world hates us, and I for one don't blame them.

The people that come back from abroad with wonderful stories of their experiences with other peoples and places....they are the ones who carry themselves in a way that explains why they have such positive experiences.

And the ones that don't? They's probably be better off at a monster truck rally, or in the audience at Jerry Springer. :rolleyes:

I maintain that if all of society were to follow the tenets of a 12 step program, this would be a better world. But that is just not going to happen.