MONK
© 2002 USA Network
July 29 August 4: End, Summer, End
By: Sonia MansfieldDate: Monday, July 29, 2002
I can't wait for summer to be over.
I guess that truly means I'm a grownup now, huh? When summer isn't about fun anymore. It's just an extra hot time of the year that makes my electric bill skyrocket and forces me to find new ways to entertain myself because all my favorite shows are in reruns.
Oh god, I'm just so tired of reality shows and reruns.
I'm missing my old friends new episodes of BUFFY, ANGEL, CSI, 24, SCRUBS, GILMORE GIRLS, BERNIE MAC, LAW & ORDER in all its various forms, the entire Sunday night line-up on Fox.
I tired of occupying my nights with AMERICAN IDOL and E! TRUE HOLLYWOOD STORY installments. Sure, shows like MONK and THE DEAD ZONE are nice, but they're just not enough.
There's only so much a TV critic like myself can take. I'm not made of steel, people. I have feelings. Week after week of mind-numbing TV is really starting to take its toll on me, physically and emotionally. If it wasn't for my TiVo-ed HOMICIDE episodes I would be totally freakin' out.
Damn, I want summer to be over.
I want the new TV season to start... you know, so I can start bitchin' about how crappy all the new shows are and get disappointed and frustrated when a new show that I do happen to like gets cancelled after two episodes.
Oh, how I miss that.
Got something to say? E-mail it to me at RedSonia@cinescape.com.
Now, let me break down the week for you. Oh, and as always, check your local listings.
Monday, JuLY 29
Clark can't control his new X-ray vision power in this repeat of SMALLVILLE (WB, 9 p.m.). Gee, you think the whole X-ray vision thing is supposed to be symbolic of other things that teenage boys can't control? Hmmm, I wonder.
You don't want to miss host James Lipton singing the praises of EXTREME MEASURES when Hugh Grant stop by on INSIDE THE ACTORS STUDIO (Bravo, 8 p.m.).
Sara investigates the murder of a dot-com boss in tonight's all-new WITCHBLADE (TNT, 9 p.m.). Gee, I wonder if some of the dot-com investors are suspects?
Kevin James, Joey Lauren Adams, Jeanne Tripplehorn and Peter Berg chow down with Jon Favreau in DINNER FOR FIVE (IFC, 8 p.m.).
TUESDAY, july 30
Buffy cuts her hair and gets zapped with an invisibility ray in tonight's repeat of BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER (UPN, 8 p.m.). Hey, there's a couple of haircuts in my past that made me wish I had an invisibility ray.
Lex persuades MONK © 2002 USA Network
Hey everybody, it's POINT BREAK but instead of surfing it's car racing. Yep, I'm talking about THE FAST AND THE FURIOUS (Starz, 7 p.m.).
Wanna see the worst comb-over in the history of comb-overs? Check out Bill Murray in KINGPIN (FX, 7:30 p.m.).
WEDNESDAY, JULY 31
While out on a mission, Trip and Reed are convinced the Enterprise has been destroyed in this repeat of ENTERPRISE (UPN, 8 p.m.). This revelation is followed by much making out because, hey, they're going to die anyway, right?
Ewwwww, SUPERMAN IV: THE QUEST FOR PEACE is on TNN at 9 p.m.
Jamie gets enmeshed in a hate-crime debate when she covers the murder of a homosexual man in tonight's all-new BREAKING NEWS on Bravo at 8 p.m. I know TV Guide said GILMORE GIRLS is the Best Show You're Not Watching, but really it's BREAKING NEWS. So watch it!
John Cusack Alert! The Oxygen Channel has the excellent, hilarious THE SURE THING at 8 p.m.
Oh, and don't forget about the all-new SOUTH PARK at 10 p.m.
THURSDAY, August 1
The story of a curse on two escape-artist brothers who worked during the time of Houdini is featured in tonight's BEYOND BELIEF: FACT OR FICTION (Fox, 8 p.m.).
The geek inherits the earth when a jock is shot in a high school restroom in this rerun of CSI: CRIME SCENE INVESTIGATION (CBS, 9 p.m.).
This one sounds weird, but in a way it's kinda funny. NBC is premiering THE RERUN SHOW tonight at 9:30 p.m. Basically, a comedy troupe re-acts the original scripts of shows like THE FACTS OF LIFE and DIFF'RENT STROKES, but they add a little something to make it funnier than it was the first time around. You have to see it for yourself.
TNN has got TOP SECRET! at 9 p.m.
Oh, and BBC America brings you two episodes of MONTY PYTHON'S FLYING CIRCUS, starting at 9 p.m.
FRIDAY, august 2
The Disney Channel kicks off an 11-episode marathon of KIM POSSIBLE, starting at 6:30 p.m.
I dare you to watch BULL DURHAM on TBS at 7:30 p.m. and not crack a smile every time Tim Robbins is on screen. The guy is just comedy gold.
The members The sixth season cast of STARGATE SG-1 © 2002 The Sci-Fi Channel
Check out FARSCAPE on Sci Fi at 9 p.m.
And then there's an all-new ODYSSEY 5 on Showtime at 10 p.m.
Oh, and there's an all-new MONK at 10 p.m. on USA Network.
SATURDAY, august 3
Sci Fi has got the INTERVIEW WITH A VAMPIRE rip-off THE VAMPIRE JOURNALS at 8 p.m.
These paperclips do more work around here than you!!! IFC has got SWIMMING WITH SHARKS at 8:30 p.m. If you haven't seen it, you must. Kevin Spacey will make your boss seem like a pushover.
Get your 'toon on! The Cartoon Network has got THE POWERPUFF GIRLS followed by SAMURAI JACK, starting at 9 p.m.
It puts the lotion in the basket when it is told. Check out THE SILENCE OF THE LAMBS on TMC at 11 p.m.
SUNDAY, august 4
Planet Express gets a new CEO in tonight's repeat of FUTURAMA.
Warren's estranged Vin Diesel in THE FAST AND THE FURIOUS © 2001 Universal
Remember that episode where Marge was a cop? Well, now Homer's a cop in this repeat of THE SIMPSONS (Fox, 8 p.m.).
Hank joins an all-Asian country club in this repeat of KING OF THE HILL (Fox, 8:30 p.m.). Yeah, I'm sure there's an all-Asian country club in Texas.
Wesley preoccupies himself with protecting Connor and foiling the prophecy about Angel and his son in this repeat of ANGEL (WB, 9 p.m.), but does anybody thank him for all his effort? Nooooooooo!
Dixon and Sydney hit Vegas on a mission, but things get crazy when Francie and her man show up in tonight's repeat of ALIAS (ABC, 9 p.m.).
There's a full hour of MALCOLM IN THE MIDDLE starting at 9 p.m. on Fox.
UPN has got a rerun of ENTERPRISE at 8 p.m. while the WB has got a rerun of CHARMED at 8 p.m.
The Cartoon Network's ADULT SWIM begins at 11 p.m.
Don't forget to check out tonight's all-new THE DEAD ZONE at 10 p.m. on USA.
Remote Patrol is our weekly Television column.
