JUSTICE LEAGUE OF AMERICA: BATMAN - THE STONE KING
© 2002 Pocket Books

Mania Grade: D+
Publisher: Pocket Books
Price: $6.99
Pages: 320

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THE JUSTICE LEAGUE: BATMAN - THE STONE KING

Batman is the focus of the premiere book of the new JUSTICE LEAGUE series of paperback novels. It's kind of a cool idea to do novels about the League, with each book turning the spotlight on one hero. Unfortunately, at least in this initial volume, the grindingly slow pace of the plot, the simplistic dialogue and a rather unbelievable ending all conspire to give no fruit to that idea.

The League, having apparently been able to see cracks in a wall of cement from all the way up on their space satellite hideout, is rushing to save Gotham City from a dam that is just about to break and flood the town. Superman wants to try to repair the damned dam; but Batman, having long ago decided that the dam's building materials were substandard, instead instructs the team to quickly dig a massive irrigation ditch leading the water a safe distance away. Sure, why not.

Batman really would have saved everyone a lot of trouble if only he'd have mentioned his thoughts on the dam earlier...say, before it started to shatter. But hey, maybe he's just got a thing from drama.

During the canal digging process, however, Superman and Wonder Woman turn up what seems to be an ancient artifact. The stone pyramid is obviously of great age, but of no identifiable origin. Months later, Gotham archeologists are probing the site for clues to its origin when a new bad guy gets an origin of his own. One of the scientists is a shy loner (you always have to watch out for those guys, even if they don't live in wood shacks) who's passionate about the idea that the pyramid was some kind of ancient battery used by indigenes to store the Earth's naturally occurring piezoelectricity.

The idea is just crazy enough to prompt all the other scientists to laugh Dr. Shy-loner to scorn. Bitter, the rejected scientist stays behind as all the others go out to get dinner. His desire "to show them, to show them all!" prompts him to keep working at his hair-brained theory. If popular media teaches you nothing else, at least let it teach you this: If you're a shy loner who's got a hair-brained theory, never, ever stay behind late to work on it.

Sure enough, the scientist stumbles onto something he shouldn't and somehow piezoelectricity infects him, turning him into a massively violent killing machine. And when I say violent... damn, I mean violent. This guy really is creative in how he slices his buddies up! Pretty soon the scientist is being used as a conduit for an ancient power that's coming to establish itself on the Earth (think GHOSTBUSTERS II but with less jokes) and the League is called in to save the day.

The novel seems to be written in a "young adult" tone, with little complex vocabulary (except for the word "piezoelectric"), simplistic dialogue and over-explained exposition; and yet the villain's graphically violent nature indicates that the novel is intended for the more mature reader; especially since, by the end of the book, millions of people are dead (literally). If this is a kid's book, it's far, far too graphic. And if it's an adult book, the prose is far, far too condescending. But the single most confusing thing is that, even with all this juicy blood and gore, the book still manages to be boring.

If you're the kind of person who has money to burn, more free time than is healthy, and an obsessive need to read about THE JUSTICE LEAGUE, then maybe this book is for you...maybe. Otherwise you should probably give this one a pass. Maybe the others in the series will be better...I've always believed that the Green Lantern wasn't getting enough attention.