After Dark Horrorfest's LAKE DEAD on DVD(2008).
© Lionsgate

Mania Grade: D
Title: Lake Dead
Rating: Unrated
Starring: C. Burns, Kelsey Crane, Tara Gerard, Jim Devoti, Alex A. Quinn
Written By: Daniel P. Coughlin
Directed By: George Bessudo
Distributor: Lionsgate
Original Year of Release: 2008
Extras: Miss Horrorfest Contest Webisodes

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LAKE DEAD

When Lionsgate announced that it had “8 Films to Die For” I thought, “yeah right”. I was taken back by Lake Dead because in all honestly it may actually kill you. Several years ago, Kevin Williamson and Wes Craven gave a lecture on the do’s and don’ts of surviving a horror film in their movie Scream. Love it or hate, Scream brought up the IQ of the movie going audience by pointing out all that you should or shouldn’t do in a scary movie. My personal belief was that this not only educated the audience, but also the directors and writers out their making horror films as well. Lake Dead is your stereotypical horror movie right down to its final moments that Kevin Williamson’s Scream script made of fun of. In the 8 Films to Die For, Lake Dead is the schlock that all horror fans make fun of, in a bad way.

Three sisters find out that they have just inherited an old hotel left to them by a grandfather they never knew. They have been estranged from their extended family for reasons only know to their absentee father. Looking for a connection (and to make a profit off of selling the old hotel) they travel up to Lake Motel to discover their roots and reap the world wind of an inheritance. 

The sisters are your stereotypical hot models who cannot act in a horror film. Brielle (Kelsey Crane) is very sweet but not too sweet, she has a tough side. There is Kelli (Kelsey Wedeen), the little sister, who is completely innocent. Then of course there is the bad sister, Sam (Tara Gerard). They gather up some friends and travel to this remote motel in a Winnebago. This enables the audience to get to know those who are about to die. There is the long time couple Bill (Alex A. Quinn) and his would be, if he would stop cheating, fiancée Amy (Vanessa Viola). The little sister’s smoking hot slut of a best friend, Tanya (Malea Richardson). Then there is the one can act, which is good because he is playing the hero, Brielle’s fiancé’ Ben (Jim Devoti). These additional characters are present so the sisters could live long enough to discover the truth about their family.

At the hotel, we find a frail old woman who turns out to be their grandmother (Pat McNeely). Later the sheriff (James C. Burns) shows up because one of the gang went missing. He turns out to be their uncle. After their grandmother and their uncle have an all too affectionate kiss the plot of Lake Dead really spirals into unoriginality. Yes, if you can believe it, someone took the Hills Have Eyes, Psycho and Texas Chainsaw Massacre and put them together. 

What amazed me was the film stock looked great for the quality of film this was. It actually looked like a real movie. Usually films of this nature have that direct to video quality to it. The acting wasn’t even up to direct to video par though. There have been high school plays with more emotions and feeling than all these beautiful people had walking around spouting moronic dialogue in idiotic life threatening situations. 

The ending is one drawn out escape that reveals all the “scary” inbreed ties the girls have to the insane, yet boring, homicidal killers. As the one liner’s got even worse my brain shut off even further. I’m surprised Lake Dead didn’t clean up at the Razzie’s last year. 

Most films I can find one or two things that make me feel better about the amount of time I spent. Lake Dead didn’t have one redeeming quality to it. So please don’t waste your time on Lake Dead. I did, so you wouldn’t have to. 

Special Features:

The special features were not present for review.

Tim Janson and Robert Trate will be bringing all 8 Films to Die For to Mania. Please check the site everyday for continuing coverage of After Dark’s Horrorfest.