michaelxaviermaelstrom's Blog

Pseudobulbar Paraphroneogenesis: Uncontrollable Laughing at the Insanity of Existence.

H.P Lovecraft & Vaginas

(Mon 03/05/2007 06:58pm)

 
Scarlet, open personal (b)log stardate: *scribble* *scribble* *erase* carry the 2 - March 5rd. 

Mr. GoodieGoodie is interfering in my rehab again.

Doc denies it but I know Batman was here at Arkham Asylum today - down the corridor I heard 2 face cursing at himself and Cobblepot was quacking like clockwork, like an anthropomorphic Bat alarm system. 

Quack Quack Quack Whoop Whoop Whoop Quack Quack Quack..

Then it all goes quiet; a few minutes later two glorified apes in white frocks that fancy themselves nurses-aides tazer my ballsack and I go down. 

Sadistic goons used a gun on each testicle. I mean really, a GUN ON EACH TESTICLE? - Hmmmmmmmmmmm(n) INSPIRED.

Another time and place I might even call them friend HAHAHA.

Notes to self: order chocolate bunnies and balloons for Easter, oh and don't forget to tear the skin off their flesh with a bacon stripper next time you break out of here.  Hey, You wanted to behave like pigs, I'm just completing the metaphor.

Just woke up now - judging by the watch I had snuck in here up one of my visiting clownboys sphincters - it's now 3 minutes later.

I feel calm, but my brain is off kilter, I'm HALF SANE I can feel it.

Fuckin Batman, he had my meds increased by one thousand percent.

What are you afraid of Batman? little ol moi?

So here I am, half-sane, making a (b)log entry to a voice activated computer embedded - out of reach - into the ceiling that I've decided to name Scarlet.

Half sane is not a good neighborhood, I hate being anywhere near sane, I start to remember ..things.

..a white dress, flowers, a kid on the way, never having enough money but trying, the spectacularly hilariously stupid death of the woman and the kid, then blood and pain and acid and laughter.

I don't know what it all means but I know I don't want to think about it, so Scarlet, let's make use of the half-sane moment to talk about the guy that Arkham Asylum is a homage to: H.P Lovecraft.

I always hear people askin, "Hey mister, how do you get your suits so spectacularly purpled?"

and the answer is of course, Barney-The-Dinosaur, he's on one of the lower levels here; in hardcore Arkham Asylum solitary; that dude's seriously wacko, whenever they let him out I give him a couple of CC's of my blood to drink, he bleeds a nice deep shade of purple on my suit.

But that's not really the right question here is it? OK more on topic, I often hear people saying,

"I hear H.P Lovecraft is very interesting but may be difficult to read, so where do I start?"

So here's my go at a "serious" answer Scarlet, while I'm (half - Ed) sane, for whatever that's worth.

Hunh-Hunh-Hem.

*tug down on purple shirt*


Lovecraft, Cthulhu, Vaginas & PrimordialEssence - A Systems View - by mXm


If you're talking his Cthulhu stories, I'd sugg starting from the beginning with "Call of Cthulhu".

Lovecraft is one of those writers who grows on you over extended gradual paced exposure.


imo, his forte is the strength of his ideas, they generate (or is that tap - Ed) a sense of "primordial truth" within the reader., it begins to feel as though he is surfacing a genetic-memory of our not-so-long-buried superstitious supernatural past and ..origins.


his verbiage conversely is


hmmmmmmmmmmmmm(n)


controversial?


and I think this really needs to be addressed before anyone reads HPL.


I'd frame HPL's voce' as a right of passage that you must be able to both accept and pass in order to enjoy Lovecraft.


I find "Lovecraft-verbiage-criticism" to be omnipresent in some literary circles, yet I also 'ave to say I find it inconsistent if not duplicitous - Shakespeare's verbiage is not smooth as an alabaster column either, it requires considerable pause and study, and people did NOT speak the way Shakespeare wrote  - though they now wish they had said his famous one-liners.


(and as Oscar Wilde retorted when his friend said to him, "I wish I'd said that": "oh you will, you will" - Ed)


nor is William Gibson's verbiage easy to digest, yet after some internal wrangling, the critics were able to overcome their initial reaction to the non-standard prose, because of the strength of what lay beneath.


Still, I would think that most people that _in particular_ like Stephen King's textual fluidity probably wouldn't like Lovecraft ..at first glance.


(though I love both and King loves Lovecraft, so I may be wrong, maybe you just need to be a fan of compelling horror)


Today there is also imo the added element of the reader often being a bit of a writer, and there may be a familiarity there in HPL's writing,


a sense of  "I'm fairly sure I could write this, and did"


And that familiarity may breed initial contempt.


that is, _until_ the reader forces him or herself on and begins to realize that although one could readily mimick HPL's 18th century genteel voice (or early 20th century docuscientist -Ed) they couldn't match HPL's elaborate content and instinctive ability to touch the reader's primordial essence, the way Lovecraft consistently can.


(..at least not without focussed insight and considerable effort - Ed)


At which point, any wincing at his verbiage is transcended and "respect" for H.P Lovecraft arises in the reader.


Nominally.


imo what Lovecraft does quite aside from telling a story, is cause the reader to come in contact with and examine their own buried often unexamined core, your inner fears and demons; things we rarely think about because we either haven't considered them as yet, or have decided not to consider them (any further - Ed).


I know Stephen King thinks Lovecraft's Cthulhu is all about the image that boys who have never seen one have of a perceived giant maternal pickled Vagina with tentacled dangly bits.


(which could almost stand in as a description for Cthulhu's head - Ed)


When I think of Lovecraft's Herbert West Re-Animator stories, I remember _seriously_ contemplating how far I would go to extend human life after death.


(West is imo brilliantly portrayed by Jeffrey Combs in the 1st Re-Animator movie - brilliant and seductively aloof from the trappings of social niceties)

In short, I'd say simply that the prerequisite for Lovecraft (as with any author) is that the reader needs to "accept" the author's chosen voice, as a conduit, in order to move on to the meat.


I'd also stipulate that Lovecraft works better over prolonged exposure, because


a) you get used to his style 


b) he constructs his stories, so that as you move from the first of his stories to the last/from the beginning to end of his career, you wind yourself around his characters and his various mythos in an enticingly chronological/inter-connected manner.


(for example in his Herbert West stories each later one references the one before it)


c) his writing quality increases as he gets older.


Which is why I'd sugg if you want to delve into his Cthulhu mythos start at the beginning with Call of Cthulhu.


Not only is it a good start, but you have a nice long satisfying journey of increasing build and quality to sink your pods into.


It's the same sort of sugg I'd make with William Gibson, if you're the type who prefers to put his or her toes in the water then read the best short story collection available first, (Gibson's Burning Chrome -Ed) Lovecraft's At The Mountains of Madness.


if you prefer to jump into the water head first and dive down to the depths of the ocean, then Call of Cthulhu (Gibson's Neuromancer -Ed) first and continue in order of Cthulhuonological release.


That'd be my 2 bits.

--- michaelXmaelstrom.


Some links to get started:


(Read) Call of Cthulhu here:


The Call of Cthulhu by H. P. Lovecraft


(Listen to) Call of Cthulhu audio-book 'ere:


» GPod Audio Books: H.P. Lovecraft’s The Call of Cthulhu


(Read) At The Mountains of Madness 'ere:


At the Mountains of Madness by H. P. Lovecraft


and my #1 suggested way to get started with H.P Lovecraft circa 2007:


Play De-Animator (online flash game) optimally during The Witching Hour


and then from inside said game, click on "Story" followed by "read more"


to read 6 very short H.P Lovecraft stories.


Play De-Animator and Read Herbert West: Re-Animator (6 short stories) 'ere:


http://artscool.cfa.cmu.edu/~lee/deanimator.html


---

Right, that's enough half-sanity for today, bloody hell, my new suit has arrived and Barney's in solitary AGAIN.

and me all outta purple blood dye. What ever will I do?

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm(n) Blue and Red = Purple.

just have to find me a Smurfette to bleed and a red blooded American.

Any volunteers?

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Scarlet, close (b)log.


--------------
WORST StarTrek Character? - michaelxaviermaelstrom footer Michael X. Maelstrom
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Comments/Responses
1
yuzna • Mar 05, 2007, 11:20pm •
Wow, haven't heard the Lovecraft and Vagina angle a million times before :) Otherwise, a good read :)

michaelxaviermaelstrom • Mar 06, 2007, 12:02am •
Interesting. You of all people didn't appear to "get" the HPL Vagina fascination angle Brian, you used a re-animated Penis in your last HPL film. :)

Glad you liked it Brian.

Now stop readin blogs and get back to making good Lovecraft films!

(how about with a re-animated Vagina this time around? I will volunteer as your film's vagina-casting-director if you like, no it's no trouble, no really no trouble at all)

Post Script: Can't wait for House of Re-Animator.

- mXm


Jakester • Mar 06, 2007, 12:47pm •
I like Lovecraft, and I love vaginas. I just usually don't call them vaginas.

deleteduser • Mar 06, 2007, 09:50pm •
I just gave your blog entry about vaginas and lovecrafting a bang. I hope it was good for you.

michaelxaviermaelstrom • Mar 07, 2007, 10:56am •
(- Jakester -) what do you call them? trim? pink taco? love pocket? magic carpet ride?

(industrial electrical outlet - Ed)

Look Ed, that was just that one time.

(- CaptainGordon -) Aaaaaahh YeSSssSSsss. *blows ring of smoke* Nobody bangs the Vagina like you do Cap.

*WHOOP* *WHOOP* *WHOOP* *QUACK* *QUACK* *QUACK*

(Penguin slides note under cell door and waddles off back to his cell)

" *Qwack* *Qwa* *hack**cough**spew* *Moo* *Moo* "

(opening note) and they up MY medication.

Oh right, Penguin says that if anyone is a H.P Lovecraft fan (particularly of the atmosphere) and liked the DE-ANIMATOR flash game (see link above -Ed)

or even for that matter if you didn't like it, we ought check out EX-MORTIS.

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm(n) I concur with Penguin; I just started playing EX-MORTIS (last night at midnight - Ed) and it's an awesome small free H.P Lovecraft influenced online horror game.

WARNING TO FELLOW LUNATIKS! (that's Maniacs! - Ed)
if you have a weak heart or scare easily play this game the way I did (heavily inebriated at midnight) what a bloody blast.

May take a couple of minutes to load depending on your connection speed, but it's worth it.

Play this late at night, alone, or better yet with an easily frightened kidnap victim (or friend - Ed), with volume on full, for full effect.

Best (free flash) online horror game I've yet found.

Play H.P Lovecraft-influenced EX-MORTIS here:

http://jayisgames.com/exmortis/

- mXm

Jchobot • Mar 27, 2007, 06:04pm •
I fucking LOVE HP Lovecraft!!! Celebrate his entire collection.

LAgrrl • Apr 06, 2007, 02:31am •

I don't know if I should thank you for this or slap you for it heh but that Ex-mortis game scared the hell out of my friend. OMG she was screaming and jumping around the room! I think I'll go with "thanking" you Maelstrom. SLAP. heh heh.

michaelxaviermaelstrom • Apr 06, 2007, 08:30am •
*inhales aroma* MMmmmmmmmmMMmmmmmmmm..

(gazes up from rubber floor, his deep straight-jacket-secured medically-prescribed contemplation, broken)

JESSICA CHOBOT is in the cell house!?

^Raise-Eyebrow.

(uh, don't trust him Jessica! - Ed)

Oh, do excuse the state of the place Jessica, *punches Ed in the nose* I gave the maid the week off.

(ow. owd nu get out of da straight jacket? - Ed)

my my, you are soooooo lovely Jessica... and sooooo intelligent..and as a fellow lunatik H.P Lovecraft enthusiast..so wonderfully potentially evil and hopefully corruptible..

(you wish Maelstrom! - Ed)

but where are my manners? come Jessica, your lovelyness, let us sit upon the sea and talk of the death of cabbages and kings, and whether bats have wings..come sit upon my thi..

*DZZzzZZzZzZZzzZzzZzzZZzzZZzz*

*DzzZZZZZzZZZZzzzZZZzzZZZzzT*

Ah.

Testicle Tazering therapy time again is it Nurse Brute' ?

Goodnight Jessica my unrequited love.

*collapse*

michaelxaviermaelstrom • Apr 06, 2007, 08:50am •

re: SLAP

(- LAgrrl -) *rubs cheek* when did this become abuse-moi week hmmmmmmmmmmm(n)

Perhaps I just happened to be in the right frame of mind for it (insane and inebriated - Ed) but I'm with your 'mate, I had a bloody blast with EX-MORTIS.

No doubt you've already discovered it but in the interest of furthering the jumping about and SCREAMING in your house..

..if you enjoyed EX-MORTIS ..

http://www.andkon.com/arcade/puzzle/exmortis2/

(must be played after midnight only)


1
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