NOT QUITE KOSHER

Not quite great, either

By Chris Wyatt     February 18, 2003

In the new crime mystery/thriller, NOT QUITE KOSHER, two thieves decide to rob the same jewelry store where they scored their first big heist as a pair. It's a year to the day since that first hit, and they feel like it will be a nice anniversary gesture. But, the big dumb one trips and accidentally kills the store's owner. The guys make a run for it, but then decide to stop for a couple of hot dogs, which turns out to be a mistake, and they have to kill a cop to get away.

MEANWHILE, Chicago police detective Abe Lieberman is in a synagogue when a guy stumbles in, avoiding the police, and wants to confess to a murder. He mistakes Lieberman for a rabbi, and tells him the whole deal. He was stuck up by a gang of street punks, and in the ensuing fight he knocked one in the head. Why this man instantly assumed the punk was dead, is unexplained. Why this man thinks that self-defense is murder, is also unexplained.

MEANWHILE, Detective Lieberman's grandson is having his bar mitzvah and it's going to cost Abe a lot. And it's this big hassle to work out all the arrangements. His wife has to work with these two annoying old ladies who are good at coordinating these things. What a pain!

MEANWHILE, Lieberman's partner is involved in a weird love triangle. On one side of the triangle is an Asian crime syndicate.

MEANWHILE, a man predicts his own death.

MEANWHILE, the recovering street punk (who didn't die by the way) gets involved with the cops...

MEANWHILE, Abe ruminates on the nature of faith.

Meanwhile, meanwhile, meanwhile...

If that sounds like a whole bunch of "meanwhile", it is. Despite the fact that author Stuart M Kaminski does an impressive job of writing believable and likeable characters, his novel has no center, no structure and no focus. Unfortunately, the book cannot be recommended.

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