Nov. 5 Nov. 11: Buffy Sings!

By: Sonia Mansfield
Date: Monday, November 05, 2001

And another one bites the dust. And another one's gone. And another one's gone...

Actually, in all fairness, WOLF LAKE hasn't officially bit the dust yet, but CBS has muzzled the low-rated show for November sweeps. Not exactly a strong show of support for the program.

Yeah, well, WOLF LAKE isn't the only one sitting on the bench for November sweeps. The show is in some very bad company, so to speak. There's INSIDE SCHWARTZ, a sorry excuse for a sitcom. And there's EMERIL, and even sorrier excuse for a sitcom. Like I said last week, who comes up with this stuff?

Here's some good news: SMALLVILLE has been picked up for the rest of the season, as has ALIAS and LAW & ORDER: CRIMINAL INTENT.

But with the good you must take the bad - ACCORDING TO JIM, THE GUARDIAN, RAISING DAD, REBA and CROSSING JORDAN have all been given the go ahead for the rest of the season too.

Why, God? Why?!

So anyway, let me break down the week for you. And as always, please check your local listings.

Monday, November 5

Who's your daddy? That's right. Angel is. As the gang uncovers a prophecy that predicts the arrival of a powerful being who could change the world (and not necessarily in a good way), Darla shows up with a little bundle of joy for Angel in tonight's episode of ANGEL (WB, 9 p.m.)

And speaking of long-lost kids, Moya's son Talyn returns over on FARSCAPE (Sci-Fi, 8 p.m.).

Tuesday, November 6

In terms of TV viewing, tonight might be the best night of the week.

Tonight is the all-singing, all-dancing episode of BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER (UPN, 8 p.m.). Even if you are not a fan of musicals, tonight's episode is a can't-miss for fans. Basically, this episode sets up the rest of the season as Tara learns Willow has been using magic on her, Buffy deals with her feelings for Spike, and Giles reveals his leaving. All of this happens in song, by the way.

Thought Halloween was

over? Well, not quite. Tonight Fox hauls out the latest THE SIMPSONS "Treehouse of Horror" episode at 8:30 p.m. First up, in "House of Whacks," Marge orders the UltraHouse 3000, a futuristic home that really, really likes her - so it tries to kill Homer. Then there's "Hex in the City," which finds Homer being cursed by a gypsy. Finally, "Wiz Kids" is a Harry Potter spoof.

Clark lives the fantasy of every teenage boy on tonight's SMALLVILLE (WB, 9 p.m.). That's right baby X-ray vision. If only Clark would pay a visit to the ANGEL set and take a good hard look at David Boreanaz for me.

It's just one of those days for Kiefer Sutherland in one of the best new shows of the season, 24, which kicks off tonight on Fox at 9 p.m. The innovative show takes place in real time, meaning each episode is one hour in the day of Sutherland's CIA agent Jack Bauer as he tries to prevent an assassination attempt of a presidential candidate. My recommendation is don't miss one hour.

If you'd rather skip the best new show of the season, then you could watch ROSWELL (UPN, 9 p.m.). Tonight, Max forces another alien to help him find his spaceship. Geez, does that guy have a one-track mind or what? It's all "I'm an alien this" and "I'm an alien that."

Wednesday, November 7

Busted! Trip learns [IMG4L]that T'Pol is sending secret messages to a Vulcan ship that has been following the Enterprise for weeks in tonight's ENTERPRISE (UPN, 8 p.m.).

That's some hicky! Nick gets bitten by Medusa in tonight's SPECIAL UNIT 2 (UPN, 9 p.m.), which gives a whole new meaning to getting stoned. HA! Get it?! Getting stoned. Woo-hoo! Sometimes I crack myself up.

Some people consider THE ABYSS (STARZ, 8 p.m.) to be James Cameron's warm-up for TITANIC, but I disagree. Sure, it doesn't have the non-threatening sex appeal of Leo to lure in the pre-teens, but THE ABYSS is still a good movie. And some chicks really dig Ed Harris.

Thursday, November 8

Grissom and his team investigate yet another crime scene on tonight's CSI: CRIME SCENE INVESTIGATION on CBS at 9 p.m. Want me to get more specific? OK. Grissom and Nick search for clues in the death of a book restorer while Catherine and Sara are called to the scene of a train crash.

On tonight's THE AGENCY (CBS, 10 p.m.) some damn reporter wants to do something outrageous like inform the public or something so therefore the reporter must be stopped. Apparently the story could result in the death of a now retired Russian general who risked his life to help the CIA. Well, that's what he gets, that dirty ex-commie. HA!

Call it "The Mole III: Yet Another Betrayal" as The Source has put some sort of spy in the witches' house on CHARMED (WB, 9 p.m.) and this somehow leads to a plot in which Piper is convinced she's not really a witch.

I'm not a fan of this show, but I'll mention it anyway THE FAMILY GUY starts tonight at 8 p.m. You know, I keep hearing this show is cancelled but then it keeps popping up. Bad animated show. Stay dead.

He's ready to spread his creamy justice all over the nooks and crannies of the city! Make sure you watch the funniest show of the new season, THE TICK (Fox, 8:30 p.m.). I promise you you won't regret it. I giggle just thinking of the show. It's that funny. I swear.

Friday, November 9

Max battles a half-man, half-wolf creature on tonight's DARK ANGEL (Fox, 8 p.m.). Hmmmm... half-man, half-wolf, I wonder if that's anything like a werewolf.

Also on Fox, there's an encore presentation of the pilot episode of 24 at 9 p.m.

BATMAN FOREVER is on UPN tonight at 8 p.m. and the nicest thing I can say about it is, "Well, at least it's not as bad as BATMAN & ROBIN."

Saturday, November 10

The Master sends some

demons to kill Buffy, but one of them develops a little crush on her in tonight's BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER (syndicated, check local listings). Awwww, how sweet.

The Cartoon Network has got a 90-minute Samurai JACK (7 p.m.) episode titled "The Trilogy," chronicling Jack's origins and training. But can he break a wooden board with his head? Oh, he can. Well, la de freakin' da!

Classic alert! Wes Craven's 1982, ummm... classic, THE SWAMP THING, is airing on the Sci-Fi Channel at 8 p.m.

Also, there's GENE RODDENBERRY'S ANDROMEDA (syndicated, check local listings).

Sunday, November 11

Get away from me, you lazy-eyed psycho! Check out AUSTIN POWERS: INTERNATIONAL MAN OF MYSTERY on TNT at 7 p.m. Still the most touching tale of a father-son relationship I've seen.

Sydney helps Shepard (John Hannah of THE MUMMY RETURNS) escape a mental institution in tonight's ALIAS (ABC, 9 p.m.). Also, Sloane learns that SD-6 may have a mole. Too bad ABC shelved THE MOLE II until January. Maybe this could've been a crossover.

Remote Patrol is our weekly Television column.