Transformers: Dark of the Moon Blu-Ray Review -

Blu-ray Review

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  • Blu-ray: Transformers: Dark of the Moon
  • Rating: PG-13
  • Starring: Shia LaBeouf, Josh Duhamel, John Turturro, Patrick Dempsey
  • Written By: Ehren Kruger
  • Directed By: Michael Bay
  • Distributor: Paramount Pictures Home Entertainment
  • Original Year of Release: 2011
  • Extras: None! See Below
  • Series: Transformers: The Dark of the Moon

Transformers: Dark of the Moon Blu-Ray Review

The Transformers Series needs an infusion of Energon

By Tim Janson     October 04, 2011


With Transformers: Dark of the Moon, Director Michael Bay gives us two films for the price of one.  One film involves giant, sentient robots kicking the crap out of each other with the fate of the world in the balance.  The other is some sort of teen drama involving Sam Witwicky’s (LaBeouf) pathetic attempts to find a job (despite saving the world twice of which he constantly reminds us), and his constant whining despite having yet another girlfriend (Rosie Huntington-Whiteley) who is way out of his league.  At this point, is there really a need for the Sam Witwicky character?  In the cartoon series, Sam was the young human who was there for kids to relate to.  I got news for ya…even kids in the 1980s hated Sam Witwicky.  Then as now we wished for just one transformer to stumble and land on top of him.  Well no such luck again!
Bay seems to have completely lost sight of what the Transformers are about as he decides to add more star power to the cast with Patrick Dempsey (who is a star for some reason…sorry I remember him as the dweeb from 1980s teen comedies); John Malkovich who plays Sam’s crazy boss but has no Earthly good reason for being in the film; Francis McDormand as Charlotte Mearing, the Director of National Intelligence; and Ken Jeong who may well be the most irritating human walking the planet.  Well more human star power can only come at a price and that price is less of the Transformers which might be a good thing considering the sheer stupidity of the plot. 
It seems that during the war on Cybertron, several Autobots escape on their spacecraft “The Ark” but the ship is damaged and crash lands on Earth’s moon in 1961.  The ship was carrying an invention capable of ending the war between the Autobots and the Decepticons.  The 1960s space race between the U.S. and the USSR is tied in as a means of seeing who could investigate the crash first.  OK so far and cool in a way to tie this in to actual history but it’s mostly downhill from there.  While investigating the site of the Chernobyl nuclear accident, U.S. Forces and Optimus are attacked by Shockwave…badass Shockwave…who then promptly disappears for about 90 minutes.  The Autobots investigate the Moon and find a de-powered Sentinel Prime, Optimus Prime’s predecessor as leader of the Autobots.  However, when Sentinel is revived he attacks the Autobots and sides with the Decepticons and plans to use his invention, a space bridge, to bring Cybertron to the Earth so Humans can be used as slaves to rebuild the Transformers home world.
Yikes!  Where do we begin?  Apparently these superior intelligent Transformers don’t know squat about physics and what would happen if you brought another planet within such close proximity to earth.  How about permanently screwing the orbit, rotation, and magnetic field of the planet, basically destroying the Earth?  So much for your slave labor!  And how exactly was this space bridge technology going to end the war between the Autobots and the Decepticons?  And where was the Ark heading before it was damaged and crashed on the Moon?  Best not try to connect many dots because it’s not going to lead to any sort of recognizable shape. 
It gets worse…Sam lives with two small Autobots, Wheelie and Brains, who are there for comic relief and are like a couple of lazy frat brothers.  Apparently the comic relief provided by Sam’s parents (Kevin Dunn and Julie White) and the comic relief provided by the returning John Turturro as former government agent Seymour Simmons was deemed by Bay to be NOT enough comic relief.  And can someone please tell me WHY Michael Bay thinks that older Transformers need to have pieces of metal hanging from their faces so that it resembles beards?  I mean if a Transformer was older wouldn’t it make more sense that they’d be a bit rusty or dented to show their age?  What kind of blade do you need to shave that face?  Like a Gillette Titanium 1,000,000?
Mike, you’ve had three shots now, and you can’t even blame Megan Fox this time around for the latest disaster.  You’ve overstuffed each succeeding film to the point of collapsing under its own weight.  Time to pass the baton off to someone else and see what they can do because clearly, you are clueless.
Blu-Ray Extras
None! Thats rightthe 2 disc Blu-ray/DVD/Digital Edition comes with no extras whatsoever. But you know what it does come with? A $10 off coupon for the Transformers: Ultimate Edition Blu-Ray that is Loaded with Never-before-seen EXCLUSIVE Bonus Content. I am speechless…


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doublec 10/5/2011 1:04:07 AM

Disaster? The 2nd biggest moneymaker of the year. Your definition of "disaster" and the rest of the world's seems to differ...

I thought this the best of the lot, however much that says. Yes it's bloated and silly like all of them, but the film has a much darker tone than the first two that I like. Scenes of the Decpticons rampaging through Chicago actually POWDERING people where creepy in a fun way.

And I may very well be in a minority here, but I am absolutely uninterested in extras or bonus material. I just don't need to see 15 hours of extras to a two hour movie. By the time you get to the 45-minute documentary by the set caterer about what happened the night they served spicy chili on the set the magic has been lost in the minutiae.

Hobbs 10/5/2011 5:42:11 AM

Wow...such harsh review for a movie that was a kids cartoon.  Seriously too many of you people have grown up to the point you want everything to be the Dark Knight.  The big difference is that Batman was that dark type of character, transformers are not.  We are talking about a movie with live robots and are complaining about physics?  Do you even want to go there with some of the movies everyone does like?

I don't put a lot into the money it made as that's not a good gage of how good it was, phantom menace anyone?  Besides which, 3D money pushed it over a billion.   Though all that being said you can't deny the popularity of these movies.  When part 4 comes out it will still made 800 mil worldwide when all is said and done.

The only thing you have a right to complain about is the double dipping thing they have going on with the DVD.  I can't stand when they do that but this transformers disc isn't the first nor will it be the last to do that.  Do what I do, speak with your money.  Don't buy it and wait a month or two for the ultimate edition to come out. 

jackwagon 10/5/2011 6:50:24 AM

Oh dear....I guess the whole "you shouldn't be expecting Shakespeare when watching a movie called Transformers" debate had to come up here.  Lest you forget, there was an episode of the original cartoon where Cybertron was brought to Earth's orbit, and it DID impact the gravity and natural disasters all over the planet.  So if the physics were important enough to the writers of the cartoon, why weren't they important enough to the writers of the film? 

I'll also bring up something I said in my comments when the film first came out in theaters: Think about the film Aliens.  It was a balls to the wall action film, and it easily could have sacrificed having memorable characters in order to have more action and explosions.  But it wouldn't have been nearly as great a film otherwise.  And no one is making any claims that it was Shakespeare, but it's an undeniably great film.  Why couldn't Transformers have given us something like that?  Why did Michael Bay feel the need to throw in so much stupid comic relief that completely undermined the overall tone of the film? 

RedHood2010 10/5/2011 7:40:08 AM

I just watched this and I have to agree with the review and grade.  YES the effects was nice, but lord all-mighty the story was off and I too found myself wishing something would fall on Sam.  My boys, bless their hearts, didn't fall asleep or get up and go play Xbox, but they didn't dig.  It seemed to take forever to get done.  Film is always good for eye candy, but bad on depth. 

And just because it made tons of money, doesn't make it makes it something that was entertaining.  That is why I rented it, looking for the action..which didn't disappoint, but fell short in story.

aegrant 10/5/2011 9:39:13 AM

I liked the movie for what it was. I will agree with Tim on the Blue Ray Extras - that's a damn shame that there are no extras, and I was thinking the same thing when I saw the coupon inside the box. SMH @ Paramount.

ActionMovieGod 10/5/2011 11:35:18 AM

Transformers kicked ass end of story!

rogue188 10/5/2011 1:46:34 PM

This movie was horrible. I want Transformers, not half a movie about whiney early 20's garbage. Whaaa, Spike can't find a job. Whaaa, Spike has issues because his girlfriend pays the bills. Whaaa, Dr. McDreamy is going to steal Spike's girlfriend. What the hell am I watching, an episode of Friends? Too much focus on crap human issues. 

And yes, the premise was poop as well. Bay has no connection to reality and neither do any of his movies. Even if they had followed the plot of the cartoon and comics, at least the script would have been somewhat legible.

ultrazilla2000 10/5/2011 2:33:56 PM

Oh yeah...another douchy film review instead of a media release review!  So surprised.  Stick to the specs and spare us yet another hater tirade.

ultrazilla2000 10/5/2011 2:48:19 PM

Yes there were plot holes...but the one's given were explained in the film if someone would actually pay attention or use a little imagination.  Since when do science fiction/fantasy films have to explain everything in realist terms?  

How was the space bridge tech going to save Cybertron?  It would allow other planets to be mined far easier for one, which could solve warring over energy and resources. 

Where was the Ark heading before it was damaged?  It was escaping the Decepticons as far as the Autobots knew...and it was also to rendevue with Megatron which only Sentinel Prime knew.  That was mentioned in the movie!

How did Cybertron not cause mass devastation on Earth?  This is a leap, but I'm going to suggest because unlike in the cartoon episode, this was not the entire planet brought over by the bridge...just a link or doorway.  Since it wasn't the entire planet, then it wouldn't have it's center of gravity, thus not causing the damage one would expect.

There's really nothing in this film that should make it more far fetched than most other genre films.  Hate it for the stupid humans and bad humor, but don't go hating on everything just for the sake of it.


RedHood2010 10/5/2011 6:34:21 PM

@ ultrazilla2000 - For the sake of it?  I didn't like it.  You did.  You defend why you liked, me and others vent for why we didn't.  Life goes on.

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