Troma's DIY cinema school

Plus: Real entity gone wild

By BRIAN THOMAS     May 31, 2005

VCDs are almost unknown in the USA, but they've been a hot item in South Asia over the past decade mainly because they're cheap and easy to bootleg. Basically they're a poor video encoding format for discs. They play on most players, but the video quality is abysmal and most features won't fit on a single disc. Some crooks on have made a hefty chunk of money selling them as DVDs on Ebay, when what they're

actually selling is a VCD swipe from a disreputable source. Perhaps they'll fade away altogether someday soon, but I was recently reminded of their Asian popularity by a piece of email spam in my mailbox with the subject line "Real entity caught on video" from a guy named "Jim". Jim attached an image file as a sample of what he describes as an "entity found in Asia". He warns, "Do not see it if you have a weak heart. It will give anyone the shivers just watching it because it is the real thing and difficult to get." Well, it can't be argued that the photo shows a "real entity", most likely Jim's girlfriend, transposed onto an image of a graveyard. Kinda spooky, and though his English isn't the best, Jim is careful not to make any claims that the video he's selling on VCD shows anything supernatural. To be honest, I'm tempted to send him the "$20 dollar" he's asking for just to see what hokey thing is on the disc, but my cynical nature prevents me from mailing money to a stranger in Malaysia. If any readers got this spam and were brave enough to actually order this video that "not many have seen" from Jim, or if you've had any experiences with a similar mystery video, please let me know via DVDShoppingList@Cinescape.com.

SPOTLIGHT OF THE WEEK

Been watching a lot of DVDs lately and saying, "I could make a movie better than that!" Well, here's your chance, bub.

(O) MAKE YOUR OWN DAMN MOVIE (Troma) Producer/director Lloyd Kaufman, the Guru of Tromaville, unveils a five disc box set that tells you everything you want to know about making movies, and a whole lot more. Things like: how to make green foam come out of an actor's mouth, and other cinema secrets. Deluxe edition includes the book version and more. A must-have for film students.

NEW RELEASES

(O) ACTRESS APOCALYPSE (Crash) Mockumentary

in which an egotistical horror filmmaker invites a film crew to document the making of his new epic, but his psycho brother starts killing all the actresses. Oops! Very black comedy ensues. Also available in an unrated directors cut that includes interviews, outtakes, deleted scenes and a CD soundtrack. Delayed from April.
(O) ANOTHER LONELY HITMAN (Artsmagic) An ex-con ex-assassin tries to go straight, but finds himself relying on old habits in defending a young prostitute from her pimp's gang. Includes commentrak, interview and more.
(O) ASIAN CULT CINEMA EXTREME HORROR COLLECTION (Synapse) Proof that Japanese horror flicks are the most hardcore is offered in this box set that includes ORGAN, EVIL DEAD TRAP, ENTRAILS OF A VIRGIN and ENTRAILS OF A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN.
(O) BATTLEFIELD BASEBALL (Subversive Cinema) Japanese splatter comedy about a high school baseball team facing a game against a team of the undead. The insanity continues in 3 short films, commentrak, Making-Of featurettes and more.
(O) BEDTIME FOR BONZO (Universal) Ronald Reagan babysits a chimp.
(O) THE BILLY JACK ULTIMATE COLLECTION (Billy Jack Enterprises/Ventura) All 5 films directed by and starring Tom Laughlin as the 1970s martial arts/counterculture hero. Set includes BORN LOSERS, BILLY JACK, THE TRIAL OF BILLY JACK and BILLY JACK GOES TO WASHINGTON, plus a bonus disc full of stuff.
(O) BOOGEYMAN (Sony) A young man investigates the closet demon that abducted his father in this promising but limp horror feature. With Making-Of, deleted scenes, featurettes, animatics and more.
(O) BOOGEYMAN (Sony) UMD
(O) BREAST MEN (HBO) David Schwimmer and Chris Cooper invent breast implants.
(O) THE BUTCHERS (Troma) Deaf-mute Talia Shire discovers that beloved local butcher Vic Tayback is getting his choicest cuts from the morgue in this 1988 horror. Includes the usual bunch of Tromatic extras.
(O) BUZZ SAW (Sub Rosa) Power tool gore horror, plus 2 commentraks, deleted footage, bonus short and more.
(O) THE CASE OF THE SCORPION'S TAIL (NoShame) 1971 Sergio Martino giallo thriller, presented uncut for the first time from the original negative, plus interviews, featurettes and more.
(O) CHRONICLE OF THE RAVEN (Lions Gate) Spooky haunted house chiller, with commentrak from stars Faye Dunaway and Gina Philips.
(O) CHU CHIN CHOW (VCI) Rare 1934 British musical version of "Ali Baba & the 40 Thieves" starring Fritz Kortner and Anna May Wong. 3-disc set includes restoration of the original 102-minute film, the shorter US version ALI BABA NIGHTS, 1935 feature ABDUL THE DAMNED with Kortner & Wong, bonus footage and more.
(O) THE COMPLETE JAMES DEAN COLLECTION (Warner Bros.) 3 films by a promising young actor: 2-disc special editions of REBEL WITHOUT A CAUSE and GIANT, plus the DVD debut of EAST OF EDEN.
(O) DARK SHADOWS DVD COLLECTION 18 (MPI) 40 more episodes on 4 discs, plus interviews.
(O) DEAD EASY (MTI) Married couple Joanna Pacula and Richard Grieco play games with each other that escalate to dangerous levels.
(O) DEAD LEAVES (Cult Epics) Award winning morbid tale of a young man who is not ready to let go when his girlfriend dies in a fall. He steals her body and hits the road. Includes director commentrak and Making-Of.
(O) DEMOLITION MAN (Warner Bros.) Wesley Snipes is a criminal from the violent 1990s who escapes from cryogenic suspension in 2032. Unable to deal with him, officials take unjustly imprisoned cop Sylvester Stallone out of the freezer to help out. A fun comic 1993 action film, plus director commentrak and more.
(O) DEVOUR (Sony) A video game transforms a teen's violent visions into reality.
(O) DUKES OF HAZZARD Complete Third Season (Warner Bros.) Classics crumbling in the vaults and the preserve this for all time. 23 episodes on 4 discs.
(O) ENEMY OF WOMEN (Troma/Roan) Rare WWII vintage screen indictment of notorious Nazi pervert Goebbels.
(O) THE ESSENTIAL STEVE McQUEEN COLLECTION (Warner Bros.) Includes THE GETAWAY, CINCINNATI KID, NEVER SO FEW, PAPILLON, TOM HORN and a remastered 2-disc special edition of BULLITT.
(O) FIRE MONSTERS AGAINST THE SON OF HERCULES (Alpha) Italian peplum action!
(O) FLOWER AND SNAKE (Media Blasters) Twisted Japanese sexploitation.
(O) FORBIDDEN PLANET (Warner Bros.) 1956 science fiction classic, in print once again with both widescreen and standard formats on one disc.
(O) FORCED VENGEANCE (Warner Bros.) Chuck Norris finds the Hong Kong triads won't just accept his vengeance with a nice card. He has to force them. Thus the title.
(O) FRIGHTMARE (Troma) When fans steal the corpse of horror star Ferdy Mayne, his ghost gets back at them. Includes the usual Tromatic-type extras.
(O) GAME OVER: KASPAROV & THE MACHINE (Facets) The 1997 chess match that was a landmark in the development of artificial intelligence. Includes commentrak, match reenactments, and Ubisoft's CHESS MASTER 10th Edition.
(O) GET A CLUE (Buena Vista) Disney Channel TV-movie with Lindsay Lohan as Lexy, an upscale NYC Nancy Drew type. Includes alternate ending in which Lexy goes clubbing and dies of alcohol poisoning. No, I just made that up.
(O) HISTORIC CLASSICS 50 MOVIE PACK (Treeline) For some, the words "historic" and "classic" don't apply, stretching from SCROOGE to KING LEAR, but this looks like another great bargain package of public domain costume dramas.
(O) HOLLOW MAN (Sony) UMD
(O) I'LL BURY YOU TOMORROW (Heretic) Award winning indie horror. Dolores, the new undertaker in town, is a workaholic with an unusual passion for her work. With 19 deleted scenes, bloopers and more.
(O) I MARRIED JOAN Collection 2 (VCI) 12 more episodes of the early 1950s sitcom rival of I LOVE LUCY starring Joan Davis and Jim Backus.
(O) KANSAS CITY BOMBER (Warner Bros.) The ROCKY of roller derby starring Raquel Welch and little Jodie Foster.
(O) LADY FROM CHUNKING (Alpha) Chinese aristocrat Anna May Wong is enslaved by invading Japanese until she leads a resistance force in this 1943 PRC Studios rarity.
(O) THE LAST FRONTIER (VCI) Lon Chaney, Jr.: Action Hero! Chaney had his first lead role in this 1932 serial as a frontier newspaper editor who fights an aborigine uprising as the Black Ghost.
(O) LONDON VOODOO (Heretic) Yanks in Briton find a voodoo church in their basement leading to big trouble with the loa. Includes commentrak, deleted scenes, Making-Of, interview with a real houngan and more.
(O) MOONLIGHTING Seasons 1 & 2 (Lions Gate) Want to see how Bruce Willis went from bartending stage actor to movie star? Want to see why '70s supermodel Cybill Shepherd is still popping up in TV movies (she's playing Martha Stewart again!)? See them both charm a nation in this clever series that mocked conventional detective shows while presenting a funny continuing soap opera.
(O) OVER THE TOP (Warner Bros.) The ROCKY of arm wrestling, starring the Rocky of ROCKY, Sylvester Stallone.
(O) THE PARENT TRAP (Buena Vista) Twice the Lindaay Lohan in this special edition of the comedy remake in which she plays twins bent on reuniting their split parents. Includes filmmaker commentrak, Making-Of, gag reel and more.
(O) PIRANHA (New Concorde) Remake of the Joe Dante schlock favorite. Probably not as good as...
(O) RAZORTEETH (SRS/Sub Rosa) Those wacky Polonia Brothers are at it again with a killer mutant piranha horror, plus commentrak, Making-Of and more.
(O) RENEGADE Season 2 (Anchor Bay) 1993 season with Lorenzo Lamas as the bounty hunting fugitive on a quest to clear his name.
(O) ROBERT GREENWALD DOCUMENTARY COLLECTION (Disinformation) The Neocons are systematically ripped in UNCOVERED: THE WHOLE TRUTH ABOUT THE IRAQ WAR, OUTFOXED: RUPERT MURDOCH'S WAR ON JOURNALISM, UNCONSTITUTIONAL: THE WAR ON OUR CIVIL LIBERTIES and a bonus disc full of extras.
(O) ROMEO MUST DIE (Warner Bros.) Jet Li falls for mob princess Aaliyah, putting him in the middle of a gang war between Oakland's Chinese and black mobs. Includes 13 featurettes, music videos, DVD-ROM content and more.
(O) SATANICO PANDEMONIUM (Mondo Macabro) Kitschy '70s Mexican nunsploitation horror in which a tormented nun is coerced by El Diablo into doing some terrible things. Santa Vaca! Includes interview, featurette and more.
(O) SET IT OFF (New Line) Abused by the system, Jada Pinkett, Queen Latifah, Vivica A. Fox and Kimberly Elise, load up for a bank robbery.
(O) SPACE DAZE (Troma) A tabloid reporter discovers a real space invader conspiracy in this sci-fi comedy. Includes Making-Of, bonus feature INVASION OF THE SPACE PREACHERS and more.
(O) SS GIRLS (Media Blasters) 1977 Italian WWII exploitation in which prostitutes are recruited as undercover agents to find traitors within the Third Reich. Includes interview with director Bruno Mattei.
(O) THE STRANGE VICE OF MRS. WARDH (NoShame) Sergio Martino's 1970 giallo thriller in which Edwige Fenech suspects that somebody she knows is a serial killer. Includes interviews and more.
(O) SUBMERGED (Sony) Steven Seagal in a submarine! I know, it sounds really exciting!
(O) TALES FROM THE CRYPT: FROM COMIC BOOKS TO TELEVISION (Tapeworm) Documentary.
(O) TEST TUBE BABIES (Alpha) Classic 1948 roadshow riot in which a troubled couple nearly self-destructs over sex issues until Dr. Wright sets things right. Plus bonus feature HELL IS A PLACE CALLED HOLLYWOOD.
(O) THE THREE AMOGOS (HBO) Steve Martin, Chevy Chase and Martin Short are silent era movie comics who find adventure in Mexico in this delightfully stupid 1986 comedy.
(O) TIME AFTER TIME (Warner Bros.) H.G. Wells uses his time machine to chase Jack the Ripper into 1979 San Francisco in this comic adventure. Includes commentrak by Malcolm McDowell and writer/director Nicholas Meyer and more.
(O) TOMORROW'S CHILDREN (Alpha) Mindbending 1934 roadshow feature in which the government offers an "undesireable" family welfare for life in exchange for sterilization!
(O) TWILIGHT SAMURAI (Empire)
(O) VIBRATIONS / FLUCTUATIONS / SUBMISSION (Image) Kinky Joe Sarno schlock triple bill from 1970, courtesy of Something Weird Video. Includes deleted scenes and more. Delayed from last week.
(O) VIVA KNIEVEL (Warner Bros.) The ROCKY of jumping over things on a motorcycle starring Evel Knievel as himself.
(O) WILLIAM SHATNER'S FULL MOON FRIGHT NIGHT Volume 1 (Goldhil) "The Shat" hosts creepers from the Full Moon vaults.
(O) ZERO PATIENCE (Strand) Victorian superman Sir Richard Burton is brought back from the dead to create a multimedia presentation about Patient Zero, the gay French-Canadian flight attendant accused of bringing AIDS to North America. Plus bonus short and music video.

And be sure to check back next weekand every weekfor CINESCAPE's DVD Shopping List!

DVD Shopping List (© 2004 Brian Thomas) is our weekly DVD column. Brian Thomas is the author of the massive new book VideoHound's DRAGON: ASIAN ACTION & CULT FLICKS, available now!

Questions? Comments? Let us know what you think at DVDShoppingList@cinescape.com.