3 Comments | Add
Rate & Share:
Related Links:
Info:
TV Wasteland: 10… 9… 8…
TV Wasteland counts down the New Year By
Rob Vaux
December 25, 2011
Another new year for the TV Wasteland
© Robert Trate
The Mania offices are closed for the holidays, but that doesn’t mean we won’t be taking a look at this week’s television viewing for you!
Monday
Rudolph’s Shiny New Year (ABC, 8:00 PM EST)
Rudolph is off to save the Baby New Year from a creepy giant vulture in the Rankin-Bass animated classic. Enjoy it kids; it ain’t getting much better this week.
The Polar Express (AMC, 8:00 PM EST)
For better or worse, this film really kicked off the mo-cap craze (such as it is). It’s a little late to the party this year, but still makes for decent post-Christmas viewing… if you can get past the creepy zombie eyes. It reruns at 10:00 PM EST and again throughout the week.
Hereafter (Cinemax, 7:45 PM EST)
Clint Eastwood is just good enough just often enough to remind us how solid a filmmaker he is. This is not one of those “just good enough” movies.
Tangled (Starz, 8:00 PM EST)
Even people who hate Disney princess movies may find themselves won over by the daffy charms of this one.
Syfy is running a Being Human marathon starting at noon EST.
Tuesday
The Adventures of Sharkboy and Lavagirl (Disney, 8:30 PM EST)
Robert Rodriguez just needs to stay away from children’s movies.
Zombieland (FX, 8:00 PM EST)
The rules are solid. The film, slightly less so.
Ondine (Showtime, 10:00 PM EST)
Colin Farrell departs from the norm here playing a fisherman who falls in love with a woman who may or may not have supernatural origins. It’s a little slow, but not bad.
Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time (Starz, 8:00 PM EST)
If you’ve already seen this, you probably regret it. If you haven’t, you can just skip the regret by skipping the film.
Battle: Los Angeles (Starz, 10:00 PM EST)
It doesn’t hold up well to multiple viewings, but for the first go ‘round, it’s quite an amusing ride.
Friday the 13th (Syfy, 7:00 PM EST)
There’s too many uncut movies tonight to waste your time on this one. Without the violence, what’s the point of a Friday the 13th film?
Halloween (Syfy, 9:00 PM EST)
Rob Zombie’s odious remake should be avoided no matter what form you see it in.
Close Encounters of the Third Kind (TCM, 8:00 PM EST)
A pretty good sci-fi film from some cat named Spielberg who may be going places.
Earth vs. the Flying Saucers (TCM, 10:30 PM EST)
Fun Ray Harryhausen special effects compliment an otherwise run-of-the-mill 1950s invasion movie.
Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End (USA, 8:00 PM EST)
Johnny Depp is awesome, as always, but I defy you to make the slightest bit of sense of this plot.
Wednesday
Loony Tunes: Back in Action (Cartoon, 7:00 PM EST)
This sadly neglected cartoon, directed by the great Joe Dante, set the standard for how a reboot should be done.
Machete (Cinemax, 8:15 PM EST)
Apparently, we’re giving crappy Robert Rodriguez films free run of the place this week.
The A-Team (Cinemax, 10:00 PM EST)
Ah, much better.
From Dusk Till Dawn (IFC, 8:00 PM EST)
Thank God: somebody finally ordered a not-sucky Robert Rodriguez film.
Hostel, Part II (IFC, 10:15 PM EST)
I’ll say again: intense movie + ads = not very intense movie after all.
American Horror Story is done for the season.
Thursday
Three Inches (Syfy, 9:00 PM EST)
Syfy debuts a new series about a slacker who gains extraordinary powers after being struck by lightning. And they’re debuting it during the quietest television week of the year, which speaks volumes about its prospects…
Happy New Year, Charlie Brown (ABC, 8:00 PM EST)
Charles M. Schultz’s perennial underdog gets a fresh helping of existentialism just in time for the New Year.
The Incredible Hulk (FX, 10:00 PM EST)
That’s the Edward Norton version for those of you keeping score at home.
Scary Movie (IFC, 8:00 PM EST)
Wow, you mean there was a Part One at some point?
Gnomeo and Juliet (Starz, 8:00 PM EST)
Garden gnomes reenact Shakespeare… and believe it or not, it works.
Dark Water (Syfy, 7:00 PM EST)
The normally reliable Jennifer Connelly pays the bills in this feckless American version of a much scarier J-horror flick.
The Big Bang Theory, The Vampire Diaries and The Secret Circle are all reruns this week.
Friday
Chuck (NBC, 8:00 PM EST)
Chuck braves the indifference of the holidays to deliver a new episode, in which Sarah confronts the ghosts of her past and a possible threat to her mother (Cheryl Ladd).
Sanctuary (Syfy, 10:00 PM EST)
Season Four ends as the SCIU unveils new technology to destroy the Abnormals once and for all.
The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe (ABC, 8:00 PM EST)
ABC uncorks the promising beginning to the aborted Chronicles of Narnia saga, in which a quartet of British children find their way to a magical kingdom. James McAvoy is a stand-out as Mr. Tumnus the faun.
Transformers (TNT, 8:00 PM EST)
The only thing better than a Michael Bay joint is a Michael Bay joint drawn out to three excruciating hours.
The Addams Family and Addams Family Values (AMC, 8:00 PM EST and 10:00 PM EST)
If you need a break from relentless holiday cheer, Morticia, Gomez and the gang have got you covered.
V for Vendetta (BBC America, 8:00 PM EST)
That Hugo Weaving sure can purr out a line, can’t he?
The Curious Case of Benjamin Button (FX, 8:00 PM EST)
David Fincher finds his gentler side in the tale of a man who ages in reverse. It wanted the Best Picture Oscar very badly. It didn’t get one.
Fringe, Grimm and Star Wars: The Clone Wars are reruns this week.
Saturday
The Twilight Zone Marathon (Syfy, 9:00 AM EST)
Syfy runs its annual marathon of the groundbreaking anthology series, starting this morning and continuing well into the New Year.
The Bourne Ultimatum (CBS, 8:30 PM EST)
Jason Bourne uncovers another sinister conspiracy in the presumed conclusion to the Bourne trilogy.
True Lies (FMC, 7:00 PM EST)
I suppose it’s only a matter of time before James Cameron retrofits this one for 3D too…
The Abyss (FMC, 9:30 PM EST)
Same here. This is the extended version, in case you were wondering.
Fail Safe (TCM, 8:00 PM EST)
While it can’t match the lunatic brilliance of Dr. Strangelove, this speculative scenario about a potential nuclear war still packs a punch.
2001: A Space Odyssey (Sundance, 7:00 PM EST)
They just don’t get any better than this.
The Shining (Sundance, 9:30 PM EST)
Sundance follows up 2001 with another Kubrick classic, this one of a decidedly more axe-heavy variety.
AMC has a Walking Dead marathon today for those so interested. It starts at 11:00 AM EST.
Sunday
Titanic (Cinemax, 6:45 PM EST)
Not in 3D. This time.
Clash of the Titans (Cinemax, 10:00 PM EST)
Also not in 3D. Doesn’t make it suck any less.
Iron Man (FMC, 6:00 PM EST)
Robert Downey, Jr. dons the superhero suit for the first time in the film that shot the character into the superhero mainstream. It repeats at 9:00 PM EST.
2012 (Starz, 7:20 PM EST)
Could someone please wrench the camera away from Roland Emmerich’s grasping little hands? Thank you.
Shrek and Shrek 2 (TBS, 8:00 PM EST and 9:55 PM EST)
Remember when the Shrek franchise was awesome? TBS does.
The Dark Knight (TNT, 6:00 PM EST)
Before we get too caught up in The Dark Knight Rises, let’s pause and remind ourselves just how high the bar has been set. Damn, that’s high.
Happy New Year everyone!
LOGIN
REGISTER
RSS
HOME
Pretty slim pickings this week.