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No Vaginas For Michael
Ode to a frog on the afternoon of clean bedsheets - from The Egg
By Mary Magdalene Smith
April 19, 2008
Nuns Having Good Clean Fun!
Auntie Stella and my Mum have been at the accountants all week for Year Rend, so Stella said that I can write the column this time as long as I behave myself and don't bloody swear, else Dark Jedi will delete me. Whatever.
I tried to register on the login so that I could talk to you guys but the bloody software wouldn't let me in. It's not fair what Stella said about my album, The Egg, it's well bangin'. Just nobody gets me because I'm ahead of my time, innit? So now I'm emailing with this awesome academic in New Jersey named Professor Hugh Payne about the medieval troubadours and the secret codes in the poetry of Jehan l'Ascuiz, which I'm setting to music. I fancy myself as a troubadour traveling around the world spreading enlightenment kuz everyone knows that the troubadours were all Sufi masters. Jehan l'Ascuiz also knew the truth about Joan of Arc, who was also probably a Sufi master. He started out in the Corbieres and ended up in Scotland, which makes complete sense when you know the whole story so you'll just have to buy the album.
But Auntie Stella said I have to explain to Michael the Maniac about Maranatha while I'm here. She said to tell him that all the underground groups like the Herrings and the National Treasure boys are mates and share information but, although she knows Duncan, the Maranatha group isn't part of the Herrings. The Herrings have very strict policies about not mixing money with secret knowledge. This is against the Rules of the Universe, innit? Stella says that she's been watching the complete crutterz what's happening to Duncan and that someone should tell him to call her again so that she can remind him that "Geburah is a Bitch" which is probably a bloody swear word, innit? So the way that the Maranatha discussion got onto the Mania forum is because Auntie Stella reviewed the Maranatha Puzzle book for another website and the discussion followed her here a long time ago and just kept going even though she can't post on the forum anymore.
Stella also said to tell Michael that he's going in the right direction but that it's not the destination that counts but the process of getting there what's important. She'll probably kill me for saying this but you guys should study the life of Sir Isaac Newton, who was also a Grand Master of the Priory of Sion, like Leonardo da Vinci. Newton even copied out the work of another Grand Master, Nicholas Flamel, by hand which is where the Maranatha word come from, innit? Of course everyone knows that the Priory of Sion tain't real, but all the Grand Masters can be navigated like a matrix, Stella's done it loads of times.
OK, guess I'm done here now. This new Mania site is well bangin', innit?